One Hundred Days of Drabbles: Double Time!
by GrandOldPenguin
Summary: Each day from February 1 until May 11, 2010, I wrote a 200-word "double-drabble" story based on "The Penguins of Madagascar." Please see the note atop the first chapter for the rules which I followed on this project.
1. February 1 to February 10, 2010

**The Plan:** Following success in my original "One Hundred Days of Drabbles" project, in which I wrote 100-word stories about "The Penguins of Madagascar" each day from September 7 until December 15, 2009, I have decided to do another long-term drabble project, this time doubling the word requirement to 200 words. The rules that I have set for myself in the project are provided below – the rules are exactly the same as for my original project, except each story will be 200 words this time. This project will run from February 1 until May 11, 2010.

**The Rules:**** 1.**) Each drabble must be exactly 200 words without exception. **2.)** Each drabble will be numbered and dated at the top, as well as given a brief title. This information does not count towards or against the 200 words which form the body of the drabble. **3.)** To avoid overburdening readers, drabbles will not be released individually. Instead, 10 will be published at a time and will form one "chapter." There will be a total of 10 chapters, one as close to every 10 days as possible. **4.)** The individual drabbles must be written on the dates they are represented as. No drabbles can be written in advance, nor can any be made-up for any dates missed. An idea, however, may be thought of ahead of time, so long as none of the actual drabble is written as such. **5.)** The subject of the drabble does not necessarily have to take place on the date it is presented as. **6.)** Any drabble which may warrant further information to be provided to readers shall have placed after its title a number-letter denotation in brackets (example: "[1A]"). Readers can then read the additional notes at the bottom of the chapter. **7.)** Words which are hyphenated count only as one word.

Well, those are the rules I have set for myself. Can I meet my own challenge – again? Below are the first 10 drabbles (February 1-10, 2010). Once again, I hope you'll wish me luck!

* * *

* * *

* * *

**1.) February 1, 2010:**** "A Ninja's Worst Enemy"**

"Hey, guys!" Marlene greeted as she entered the penguins' habitat to find the team yet again practicing defense drills with bowling pins disguised as ninjas. "Still playing with the bowling pins, eh?"

"Marlene, how many times do I have to tell you that these bowling pins represent evil ninja warriors?" Skipper wondered, but in a friendly way, as he then turned to his men. "Show no mercy, boys."

Upon hearing Skipper's order, Private punched down two of the pins while Rico toppled four with a karate chop. Next, Kowalski gave a kick to take down the remaining four.

"Three penguins to knock down 10 bowling pins," Marlene chuckled. "That's interesting."

"Oh, really?" Skipper said sarcastically. "If you think you can do better, be my guest."

"OK," Marlene replied. "Set them up."

Skipper waddled over to the pile of bowling pins and set them up, then returned to Marlene.

"All right, Marlene, show me what you got," he said.

Marlene then pulled out a bowling ball and stuck her fingers in the finger holes. She then lined the ball up and released it toward the pins.

"Strike!" Rico exclaimed from across the platform.

"And that's how it's done, Skipper," Marlene stated.

* * *

**2.) February 2, 2010:**** "Otter Day"** [1A]

"OK, gentlemen, let's be very, very quiet," Skipper said to the other penguins, the lemurs, and the chimps as they all gathered outside of Marlene's cave before sunrise. "We don't want to wake up Marlene before her big moment."

Skipper then carefully led the group into Marlene's home; upon entering it, everyone gathered around Marlene's bed and began staring at the sleeping otter with great anticipation.

"Eh, how long do we have to wait?" Julien asked.

"Until Marlene wakes up," Kowalski replied. "Then we'll see if she sees her shadow or not so we can predict if we'll be having six more weeks of winter or an early spring."

Marlene then rolled in her bed.

"This is it," Skipper said.

Marlene opened her eyes.

"Aaahh!" she screamed as she awoke, not expecting the crowd in her home. "What are you all doing here, and what's with the top hats?"

"It's Groundhog Day," Private replied. "We've come to learn your prediction."

"Guys, I'm an otter," Marlene stated. "I don't make predictions."

"Look right next to you, Marlene," Skipper said. "Do you see your shadow?"

"Yeah, but–" Marlene began.

"Prediction made, boys," Skipper declared. "Six more weeks of winter it shall be."

* * *

**3.) February 3, 2010:**** "State of the Zoo"** [2A]

Each year by tradition, one week after the presidential State of the Union address, Skipper would give his annual State of the Zoo message at the zoovenir shop. This year was no different.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the Penguin Leader of the Central Park Zoo," Private announced from the shop's doorway as Skipper entered the applause-filled room.

Skipper then waddled down to the front of the room, where a podium had been set-up for his address. Behind him sat Kowalski, his Lieutenant Leader, and Marlene, his Secretary of State. He shook both of their appendages before addressing the crowd.

"Ladies and gentlemen, mammals and lower mammals, thank you for joining me tonight," he said. "I've led my men on many exciting missions over the past year. Among them include watching a duck's egg, getting rid of an obnoxious walrus spy, and restoring the popcorn flow to zoo residents."

Everyone politely clapped at Skipper's statement, but Marlene was especially enthused by the popcorn one.

"Yes, popcorn!" she stood up and shouted. "Three cheers for the Penguin Leader! Hip-hip, hooray! Hip-hip, hooray! Hip–"

But she stopped when the crowd fell silent and began to stare.

"Ah, carry on, Skipper," she said, sitting down.

* * *

**4.) February 4, 2010:**** "Insubordination?"**

After a morning of rigorous training, Skipper led his men back into the HQ.

"Boys, I think we've earned a short break," he said as took a seat in a chair. "If anyone needs me, I'll be sitting over here."

A few minutes later, Private waddled over.

"Can I help you with something, Private?" Skipper asked.

"Just hold on, sir," Private said. "This should only take me a second."

"What should only take–" Skipper began to ask, but he was suddenly slapped in the face by Private.

"Private, what do you think you're doing?!" Skipper yelled. "That's insubordination, mister!"

"But, sir, I just–" Private began, but Skipper didn't want to hear it.

"No excuses, soldier!" Skipper barked. "I'm your commanding officer, and I thought we were friends!"

"But, Skipper, listen," Private persisted. "Please?"

"Fine, Private, what is it?" Skipper conceded.

"There was this bug on your face, sir," Private said as he showed Skipper the bug's splattered remnants on his flipper. "I was only trying to help."

"Well, that does explain things," Skipper replied.

"So you're not mad?" Private asked.

"No," Skipper chuckled. "But that was a pretty good slap."

Private smiled.

"I learned from the best, sir," he said.

* * *

**5.) February 5, 2010:**** "Odd Man Out"**

"Ooh, what are you guys watching on the telly?" Private asked the other three penguins upon returning to the HQ from a short mission that Skipper had sent him on.

"It's a DVD of the movie 'March of the–'" Kowalski began before Skipper interrupted.

"Kowalski!" he exclaimed. "Didn't we already decide not to tell Private?"

"Oh, right," Kowalski remembered.

"Yup," Rico said.

Private then waddled over to Skipper, who looked up at him before pausing the movie.

"Sir, why can't I know?" Private inquired.

"It's nothing personal, soldier," Skipper replied. "It's just that you may be a bit too young to watch this movie."

Private sighed.

"Fine, sir," he said. "I guess I'll go back out for a while so you all can finish the film."

Private then waddled over to the ladder and climbed it up to the platform outside.

A short time later, Maurice came by.

"You seen King Julien around?" he asked.

"No," Private replied. "Sorry, Maurice."

"OK," Maurice said. "Say, what are you doin' up there all by yourself anyway?"

"The guys won't let me watch 'March of the Penguins,'" Private replied as he chuckled. "Of course, they don't know that I've already seen it twice."

* * *

**6.) February 6, 2010:**** "World's Greatest Mammal"**

Julien and Mort entered Marlene's habitat one morning to find the otter drinking from a coffee mug which had "World's Greatest Mammal" printed on it in big red letters.

"Where did you get that?" Julien gasped as he snatched the mug from Marlene's paws, causing the coffee to slosh onto the floor. "It obviously belongs to the king, which is me."

"No, it's mine," Marlene said as she yanked it back. "It was a gift."

"But I am certainly the world's greatest mammal," Julien declared as he tugged the mug away again.

"Julien, be careful," Marlene said worriedly as she grasped the cup. "Skipper gave me that mug – it's very special to me."

"But I'm king, so gimmie!" Julien insisted as he continued pulling on it, causing it to fall out of both of their hands.

Just as Marlene was about to watch her favorite mug shatter against the floor, Mort caught it.

"Yay!" he cheered.

"Good Mort," Julien said. "Now hand that mug back to me."

But Mort just couldn't do the wrong thing.

"No, it belongs to Marlene," he said as he handed it to her, then turned to Julien. "But I'll get you one for your birthday."

* * *

**7.) February 7, 2010:**** "Cannibal Run"** [3A]

"So you boys really thought that I, your friend and commanding officer, was trying to eat your brains?" Skipper asked his men as they all lay on a bed in the veterinary office after having all fallen from a rooftop, breaking their flippers.

"Well," Kowalski began, "with those bandages wrapped around your body, combined with your incoherent state, we just naturally assumed you were a zombie determined to dine on the contents of our craniums."

"_Really?_" was all Skipper could reply.

"Skipper," Private then said, "would you ever eat any of us if we were stranded somewhere and had no food to survive?"

"Private!" Kowalski scolded. "I knew I never should have let you read that Donner Party chapter in my encyclopedia."

"That's OK, Kowalski, he can ask," Skipper stated. "The answer is no, Private, I could never resort to cannibalizing my own men."

"But what if you were the only survivor and your life depended on it?" Private continued.

Skipper shuddered at the thought.

"Listen, Private, we're all a team; if I lost any one of you, I wouldn't last too long anyway," Skipper spoke sincerely. "It's just not in my heart to have you guys in my stomach."

* * *

**8.) February 8, 2010:**** "You Owe Me"** [4A]

Two weeks after she had been railroaded into participating in Kowalski's Luv-u-Lator experiment, Marlene walked into the penguins' HQ.

"Kowalski, it's time," she announced upon entering. "You do owe me for testing your love-finding machine, and today's the day."

All four penguins then approached Marlene.

"A deal is a deal, Marlene," Kowalski said. "What did you have in mind?"

Marlene smirked.

"Oh, just a little taste of your own medicine," she said as she turned to Rico. "Rico: Spit fishin' time."

Rico looked to Skipper, unsure if he should accept an order from anyone else.

"You heard the lady," Skipper replied, thus granting Rico permission.

As Rico then hacked-up a cotton swab, Kowalski took a step back.

"You can't do this to me!" Kowalski declared. "I'm a scientist!"

But Rico had his orders.

"Say _aah_," he said as he swabbed inside Kowalski's bill.

After obtaining the DNA sample, Rico placed the swab inside the Luv-u-Lator, which Kowalski had ultimately decided to recover from the trash can he had thrown it in. Little did Kowalski know that Marlene had conspired with Skipper the day before to rig the results as a practical joke.

"_Subject not compatible_," the machine beeped and read.

* * *

**9.) February 9, 2010:**** "Mirror Madness"**

"I love you," Julien said aloud as he pointed toward himself while looking at his reflection in the new mirror that he had hung on the wall.

Julien then pointed at his reflection.

"I love you more!" he said before pointing back at himself. "No, I love you more!"

He then pointed back at his reflection.

"No, I love you more!" he said before repeating this pattern over and over, louder and louder each time. "No, I love you more! No, I love you more!"

It became so loud that the penguins heard it from atop their habitat's platform, and after 25 minutes of listening to it, they had all had enough.

"I can't it take anymore!" Skipper declared as he looked at his team. "Let's roll."

Moments later, the penguins entered the lemur habitat and approached the self-absorbed king.

"I love you more!" Julien continued with his mirror routine before pointing at Skipper. "Eh, but I don't love you more."

Skipper then began to swing a hammer toward the mirror before Julien stopped him.

"What in the name of me are you doing?!" he questioned. "Do you want seven years of bad luck?"

"It'll be worth it," Skipper declared.

* * *

**10.) February 10, 2010:**** "Clouds"**

Skipper waddled past Marlene's habitat one morning, noticing Marlene lying on her back and staring into the sky.

"What are you doing, Marlene?" Skipper inquired.

"Spotting cloud shapes," she replied. "Haven't you ever done that before?"

"Can't say I have," Skipper answered.

"Then come try it," Marlene said. "Come on, Skipper, live a little."

Skipper was a bit skeptical if this was appropriate behavior for a military leader, but he decided to try it anyway. He entered Marlene's habitat and lay down beside her.

"OK, Skipper, I think that one looks like a carousel horse," Marlene said, pointing at a cloud.

"Nah," Skipper replied. "Looks more like a crossbow to me."

"Crossbow?" Marlene whispered sarcastically. "How lovely."

She then pointed at another cloud.

"How about this one?" she said. "I see an elephant."

"I see a tank," Skipper replied. "Hey, I'm starting to like this."

Marlene realized that she and Skipper had different ways of seeing things, but she was still glad that he had joined her. But suddenly Marlene saw a cloud shape she just couldn't deny.

"Look, Skipper," she pointed, "a nuclear mushroom cloud."

"Nope," Skipper replied. "I see a heart."

Maybe they weren't so different after all.

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1A:** This drabble, written to celebrate Groundhog Day, was inspired, in part, by Skipper's "Marlene probably saw her own shadow" and Julien's "Six more weeks of winter, everyone!" remarks in the "Haunted Habitat" episode. Also, since Kowalski said that Marlene was genetically the closest species to a guinea pig at the zoo in the "Otter Things Have Happened" episode, one could assume she's also the closest one to a groundhog as well. As for the actual Groundhog Day, Pennsylvania's Punxsutawney Phil "predicted" six more weeks of winter, mirroring Marlene's verdict.

**2A:** The most recent presidential State of the Union address did in fact occur one week earlier. There are some differences between Skipper's "State of the Zoo" and an actual State of the Union, however, including that the U.S. Secretary of State does not actually sit behind the president during it – the vice president and the Speaker of the House of Representatives are the ones that really do. As for Marlene's ecstatic reaction to the mention of popcorn, this is in reference to her saying "I can't live without popcorn!" in the "Popcorn Panic" episode.

**3A:** This drabble takes place immediately following the "I Was a Penguin Zombie" episode.

**4A:** This drabble takes place two weeks after the "Otter Things Have Happened" episode. For further reading, you may be interested in my fanfic "Life After Love," which is a Skilene friendship piece that takes place immediately after the aforementioned episode.


	2. February 11 to February 20, 2010

**11.) February 11, 2010:**** "The Tissue Issue"** [1B]

An hour after she and the penguins had successfully shipped Rhonda the walrus off to Hoboken, Marlene returned to the penguins' HQ.

"Got a minute, Skipper?" she asked upon entering. "I kinda – well – let's just say I need a favor."

Skipper then stood up from sitting down in a chair and approached Marlene.

"OK, Marlene, what do you need this time?" he quipped, but with a friendly smile.

"Well, I tried very hard, but I couldn't get it all out by myself," Marlene said.

"Get what out?" Skipper asked.

"Well, do you remember how I said that Rhonda used me as a tissue?" Marlene replied.

Skipper then knew exactly what Marlene was referring to; he shuddered just thinking about it.

"Do you think that you could help clean the fur on my back where I can't see?" Marlene wondered. "I know it's gross, but I'd do the same for you."

Skipper then walked behind Marlene to see just how bad it was.

"My, my, Marlene, Rhonda sure got you good," he commented. "I've seen prettier train wrecks."

He then returned in front of her.

"But you don't deserve to be like this," he said. "Don't worry, I'll clean you up."

* * *

**12.) February 12, 2010:**** "Warmth"**

"OK, men, I want us all to walk a mile around the zoo before 0800," Skipper announced to his team one morning.

Kowalski and Private promptly waddled over to Skipper, ready to head out with him. But Rico stayed across the room, lost in his own world.

"Rico!" Skipper called to him. "That means you, too, buddy! Let's move!"

"Need jacket!" Rico turned to Skipper and mumbled as he held up his plastic doll friend.

Skipper then turned to Private.

"What's with him?" he asked.

"Rico can't find his doll's jacket," Private replied. "He doesn't want her to be cold when he takes her outside with us."

Skipper rolled his eyes.

"Rico, she's plastic!" he shouted. "She's not going to know the difference! Besides, she shouldn't even be going on official business anyway."

"But–" Rico began.

"But nothing, soldier," Skipper said. "Come on, Rico, we're wasting valuable time."

Rico looked at his doll and smiled. Sure, he could just leave her at the HQ during the mission, but that's not what he wanted, so he scooped her up and swallowed her like a stick of dynamite.

"Rico, what are you doing?" Skipper asked.

"I gotta keep her warm," Rico replied.

* * *

**13.) February 13, 2010:**** "How Do You Like Your Coffee?"**

"Skipper, it was so nice of you to invite me over for coffee," Marlene said as she sat down at the table in the penguins' HQ one morning.

"I'm glad that you could make it," Skipper replied as he waddled over to a cabinet and removed two mugs.

He then went over to the coffee maker and filled them.

"So, Marlene, how do you like your coffee?" Skipper turned to Marlene and asked.

"Two sugars and an ounce of cream," Marlene replied.

Skipper smiled.

"Good to know, but that's not what I meant," Skipper said. "You can put your own cream and sugar in to your liking, but what I meant was, what kind of fish would you like to have in it?"

"Well, what kind do you have?" Marlene asked.

"We have sardines, anchovies, herring, and salmon," Skipper replied. "We also have canned tuna – I suppose I could scoop some into your coffee if you wanted."

"So hard to decide," Marlene responded. "What are you having?"

"I'm having mine with a sardine," Skipper replied.

"Oh, I'll have that," Marlene said.

"Comin' up," Skipper said as he placed two sardines in Marlene's mug. "I'll even let you have a double."

* * *

**14.) February 14, 2010:**** "So Much Sweeter"**

"Hey, Marlene, what are you up to?" Skipper asked upon entering Marlene's habitat.

"Oh, I was just looking through the Valentine's Day cards that I got from everybody," Marlene replied as she set the cards that she was holding down.

She then paused before giving Skipper a slight smile.

"Well," she said, "everybody but you."

Skipper sighed.

"It's nothing personal, Marlene," he said. "It's just that the whole 'Valentine's Day' concept doesn't really mean much to me. All those people smoochin' and giving each other expensive chocolates – I just don't understand it."

Skipper then waddled over to Marlene's table and tossed a box of chocolates, which he had hidden behind his back, on it.

"Of course, sitting down and _sharing_ a box of expensive chocolates is another story," he said with a smile. "Care to join me?"

Marlene looked down at the chocolate box, then to Skipper.

"Come on, Marlene, I can't eat all these by myself," Skipper said as he sat down and took the cover off the box.

Marlene smiled.

"Oh, Skipper," she said as she walked over, "this is sweeter than any card could ever be."

"Literally," Skipper replied as he put a chocolate in his mouth.

* * *

**15.) February 15, 2010:**** "Make a Wish"** [2B]

"Another well-executed routine, boys," Skipper said to the other penguins as they completed their display of cute-and-cuddliness in front of zoo visitors.

Just then, an unexpected gust of wind blew across the zoo.

"Oh, not again!" Private complained.

"What is it, Private?" Skipper asked, concerned.

"The wind just blew a feather in my eye," Private stated. "It's the third time this week!"

"Well, with 70 feathers per square inch of our bodies, that's bound to happen," Kowalski commented.

"Kowalski!" Private exclaimed as he fidgeted around in his eye with the tip of his flipper, trying without success to remove the feather. "Don't analyze! Help me!"

Kowalski nodded, then turned to Rico, who promptly regurgitated a pair if tweezers and handed them to Kowalski.

"OK, Private," Kowalski said as he held the tweezers in front of Private's eye, "stay still and try not to blink."

Kowalski then successfully removed the source of Private's discomfort.

"All right, good," Kowalski said. "Now give me your flipper."

Private then stuck out a flipper for Kowalski, though he was a bit unsure why.

"There you go," Kowalski said as he placed the removed feather in Private's flipper. "Now blow it off and make a wish."

* * *

**16.) February 16, 2010:**** "O Canada!"** [3B]

"Hey, Private, care to join us for a spot of tea?" Mason asked as Private waddled past the chimpanzee habitat.

"Sure," Private replied as he entered the chimps' enclosure. "That would be swell."

Private then sat down next to Phil at the chimps' table, and Mason filled up all three of their cups with tea.

"Thanks," Private said as he took a sip. "So, Mason, have you been watching the Olympics on the telly?"

"Why yes," Mason replied. "Phil and I tune-in every night."

"Then you must be just thrilled about Alexandre Bilodeau," Private stated.

"Ah, yes, the Canadian gold medal-winning mogul skier," Mason said. "He's an impressive chap, yes, but why do you think that I would be 'thrilled' by his victory?"

"Well, he did win Canada's first gold medal at an Olympic Games hosted in Canada," Private said. "And after all, you are–"

Private then remembered that he was the only one – besides Mason himself – who still knew that Mason was really Canadian. It was something that Mason had never discussed with anyone, and Private only knew of it because he chose not to mist himself with Kowalski's amnesia spray.

"Um, forget that, Mason," Private apologized. "My mistake."

* * *

**17.) February 17, 2010:**** "Freudian Slip?"** [4B]

"Hey, Skipper, I heard that it didn't work out with your falcon friend," Marlene walked over to Skipper and said. "What happened?"

"Well, Miss Kitka kept her word not to eat any zoo animals," Skipper said, "but she almost succeeded in eating Fred."

"Fred?" Marlene asked. "That wouldn't be the same Fred that you guys tried setting me up with, would it?"

"That's the one," Skipper replied. "Kitka just kind of spit him up and he began talking to us, just as clueless as ever."

"Wow," was all that Marlene could reply.

"Now Fred is indeed a fool, but I never wanted anything bad to happen to him," Skipper continued. "So I simply had to tell Kitka that we should see otter people."

Marlene nodded to acknowledge what Skipper had said, then realized something particularly odd about it.

"Skipper, did you just say '_otter_ people'?" she asked.

"Um," Skipper stuttered, embarrassed by his little slip of the tongue, "well, you see–"

Skipper then cleared his throat to regain his composure.

"You see, Marlene, you are an otter, and you're standing right in front of me," he said, blushing. "I guess I mixed up the word 'other' with 'otter,' that's all."

* * *

**18.) February 18, 2010:**** "Cracker Conspiracy"**

"Kowalski, what's all that crunching?" Skipper called across the HQ to his first lieutenant.

"Oh, just eating some animal crackers, sir," Kowalski replied as he began waddling over to Skipper holding the animal cracker bag. "Would you like some?"

Skipper rolled his eyes.

"Kowalski, animal crackers are nothing more than a giant conspiracy," Skipper declared.

"How so, Skipper?" Kowalski asked as he ate another cracker.

Skipper sighed.

"Because nearly all animal crackers come in the shapes of mammals," Skipper replied. "I mean, have you ever seen a penguin-shaped animal cracker, Kowalski?"

"I have neither seen nor personally eaten such a cracker, sir," Kowalski responded. "No."

"Exactly," Skipper declared. "And so proves that there is an anti-penguin conspiracy going on."

Kowalski chucked.

"Skipper, you can't possibly believe that, can you?" he asked. "I mean, animal crackers are supposed to be fun."

"Fun?" Skipper questioned. "There's only one – no, make that two – ways that animal crackers could be fun."

"And what are those, Skipper?" Kowalski asked.

"Well, a penguin cracker could be added, to start with," Skipper stated. "Or they could add a lemur cracker."

"A lemur cracker?" Kowalski asked.

"Yeah," Skipper chuckled. "It would be fun to bite their heads off."

* * *

**19.) February 19, 2010:**** "Stuck"**

"Hot fudge!" Skipper exclaimed as he waddled past Private's first prize fish on the wall, accidentally bumping into it and causing the fish to detach from the plaque. "Kowalski, Rico, help me over here!"

Kowalski and Rico looked over at Skipper, then approached their leader.

"Not to worry, sir," Kowalski said. "This can all be fixed with simple superglue."

"Uh-huh!" Rico agreed as he began to regurgitate a tube of said glue.

A few seconds then went by, but Rico had not yet hacked-up the glue.

"Anytime, Rico," Skipper looked to Rico and said sarcastically. "Today, if possible."

"_Gubba-ma-humma-kabugga!_" Rico mumbled in response.

"Rico, I have no idea what that means," Skipper declared. "Now please, the glue."

"_Na-hubba-ahugga!_" Rico continued.

"Rico, I don't have time–" Skipper began, but then he realized that Rico's bill wasn't moving any. "Oh, Rico, don't tell me that you accidentally glued your bill shut."

Rico nodded.

"I theorize that there must have been a leak in the tube Rico tried regurgitating," Kowalski stated.

"No kidding," Skipper agreed. "So, how do we fix this?"

Kowalski then scribbled down a few equations on his clipboard before responding.

"We have two options, Skipper," he reported. "Acetone or C-4."

* * *

**20.) February 20, 2010:**** "The Meaning of Life"**

"Any further business before we adjourn?" Mason asked the animals who had gathered for a meeting at the zoovenir shop.

"Yes," Private spoke up, raising a flipper. "I was hoping I could do a little survey amongst everyone here; I'd like to know everyone's opinion on the meaning of life."

"Well, I suppose we could discuss it," Mason replied, caught a little off guard by the nature of the question, as he pointed at Skipper. "Skipper, would you like to go first?"

"The meaning of life is classified, Private," Skipper stated. "Maybe I'll tell you someday if you become an officer."

Kowalski was supposed to go next, but he was busy fiddling with his abacus.

"I'm trying to figure it out now," he said. "I'll get back to you."

"Always follow your heart," Marlene said next.

"Always follow your king," Julien added. "And I'm the king, by the way."

"Fish!" Rico exclaimed. "And buttons!"

"Always ask for time off," Maurice said, "but never expect to get it."

Mort, Mason, and Phil then gave their responses; Private nodded when they were all through.

"So many different answers; I guess there's only one conclusion," he said. "Live and find out for yourself."

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1B:** This drabble takes place an hour after the conclusion of the "Roomies" episode.

**2B:** Some people, after having gotten an eyelash in their eye and removing it, blow the eyelash off of their finger and make a wish while doing so. This drabble is sort of the penguin equivalent to that practice. On a factual note, Kowalski stating that penguins have 70 feathers per square inch is indeed scientifically accurate.

**3B:** I tried hard to not reveal a whole lot of spoilers in this drabble, but I couldn't let a good idea go. The idea for this drabble stems from the "Truth Ache" episode, an episode currently only available on a special DVD of the show entitled "Operation: DVD Premiere," which was released on February 11. Spoiler warning for the rest of this drabble note: In the episode, the penguins learn the secrets of many zoo animals without their knowledge, and all is well until Private inadvertently ingests a truth serum and begins to reveal the secrets throughout the zoo, including that "Mason is really Canadian." Needless to say, this creates chaos, so set things right, Private, once he becomes no longer under the influence of the truth serum, mists all of the animals, including his teammates, with a spray to cause amnesia. Private is then the only one with knowledge of what had happened.

**4B:** This drabble takes place shortly after the end of the episode "The Falcon and the Snow Job."


	3. February 21 to March 2, 2010

**21.) ****February 21, 2010****: "Something Long Overdue"**

Skipper paced outside of Marlene's habitat, trying to think of the best way to tell her something that he considered important. Once he had the right words, he waddled in to see her.

"Hello, Marlene," Skipper greeted as he entered. "Do you mind if I talk to you about something for a minute?"

"No, Skipper, I don't mind at all," Marlene replied. "What's up?"

Skipper then waddled over to Marlene, who was sitting on her couch.

"Well, Marlene, we have been friends for a while now," he said. "I think that despite our differences, we really do have a lot of respect for and trust in each other. I think that we can talk about many important things together, and that's why I've come by today."

Skipper then cleared his throat.

"Marlene, this is long overdue," he said as he got down on one knee and looked up at her.

"_Skipper?_" Marlene remarked puzzledly; she was both confused and delighted.

Skipper then pulled out a book from underneath Marlene's couch, then stood up again and handed it to her.

"This book from the New York Public Library is long overdue, Marlene," he said. "You should really think about returning it."

* * *

**22.) ****February 22, 2010****: "Skipper's Log"**

Upon occasion, Skipper would take out his mini cassette tape recorder and record a log of missions and other happenings that went on throughout the zoo. Now was one of those occasions.

"Skipper's Log: Monday, February 22, 2010, 1800 hours," Skipper spoke into the recorder's microphone. "Earlier today, the boys and I rescued ring-tail from yet another calamity – where would he be without us? Marlene and I played chess on Saturday – I won again, but she's getting pretty good. Kowalski is still trying to locate a new element for the periodic table – he vows not to stop until _Kowalskium_ is found. Mason stopped by last week and offered me a banana – I was hesitant at first to try something new, but once I did, I found it to be surprisingly good; I have not told the others."

Suddenly, Skipper heard the motor on the recorder begin to strain.

"Oh, come on!" he exclaimed as he shook the device. "Come on!"

But his efforts were in vain – the batteries were dead.

"Wonderful," Skipper muttered to himself as he reached for a piece of paper.

He then pulled out a pen and began writing on the paper: _Skipper's Log: Procure new batteries._

* * *

**23.) ****February 23, 2010****: "Patriotic Penguin"**

In the Olympic spirit of trying to get along, the penguins invited the lemurs over to watch coverage of the Olympic Games on TV. After hours of airing various competitions, the broadcast went to a medals ceremony – the United States had won gold that night.

"Gentlemen, let us rise for the playing of our National Anthem," Skipper announced to those present as he began to stand up himself.

"Say what now, penguin?" Julien inquired.

"It is customary to stand when 'The Star-Spangled Banner' is played, ring-tail," Skipper looked over to him and replied. "And while most people don't bother when it is played on TV, I still do."

"Ah, I see," Julien said as he then stood up. "I shall now be joining you, my friend."

Moments later, the group watched on TV as the National Anthem began to play, but Skipper looked at Julien.

"Yes, penguin?" Julien asked.

"Take your crown off," Skipper whispered as he gestured at his head.

"But that is the symbol of my kingliness," Julien responded.

Skipper shook his head.

"Not during the National Anthem it isn't," he said as he removed Julien's crown from his head. "You'll get it back when the song's over."

* * *

**24.) ****February 24, 2010****: "Say Cheese"** [1C]

"Maybe next year," Marlene sighed as she sat in her habitat, holding the new zoo brochure with Mort on the cover.

At this time, the penguins just happened to be waddling by while training; Skipper decided that they ought to take a detour and say hello.

"Hey, Marlene," Skipper greeted as he and the others entered.

Marlene then approached them.

"I'm happy for Mort, really I am," she began as she pointed at the brochure, "but would you believe the photographer didn't even take one picture of me?"

"Really?" Skipper said. "You know, even though I wanted Private to win that contest, I think you deserved at least _one_ photo."

Rico then whispered something in Skipper's ear.

"Good idea," Skipper replied, turning then to Marlene. "Marlene, could you put your pink bow on, please?"

Marlene smiled, then left to fetch her bow. While she was gone, Rico regurgitated a camera for Skipper.

"Say 'cheese,' Marlene," Skipper said as she returned and he began taking pictures of her.

Skipper soon used the whole roll of film, so the penguins left to have Kowalski develop it. Or so they intended.

"Smoked salmon!" Skipper exclaimed, realizing he had left the lens cap on.

* * *

**25.) ****February 25, 2010****: "Friends Come First"** [2C]

Even Julien's testimony failed to convince Marlene that Dr. Blowhole was real.

A few minutes after Marlene had laughed it off and walked away, Skipper left the other penguins and Julien and went to locate the doubtful otter, soon finding her by the zoovenir shop.

"Hey, Marlene," he said as he approached her. "I'll tell you what, you don't have to believe in Dr. Blowhole if you don't want to; I won't force you, and it's probably better that you don't. But there is something important I have to say."

"What?" Marlene asked.

"I want you to know that I do have enemies in this world, enemies that aren't afraid to use my friends to get to me," Skipper replied. "Just by knowing me, Marlene, you could be in danger someday, so I need you to do something for me."

"What?" she inquired.

"Well, just by us being friends, you know information that my enemies might want to know," Skipper continued. "So if you are ever captured by one, hold off if you can, but tell them everything they want to know if they threaten you. I'll never be mad because no information is worth your safety – friends come first."

* * *

**26.) ****February 26, 2010****: "Contractual Obligations"** [3C]

"Pardon me, Skipper, but do you mind if Phil and I have a word with you?" Mason asked as he and Phil entered the penguins' HQ.

"Well, I suppose I could spare a second for a simian," Skipper replied. "Although I suspect that only _you_ will be having a word with me, since your buddy never speaks."

Mason nodded.

"Indeed," he said. "Anyway, Phil has recently pointed out to me that you have not yet met some of your contractual obligations with us."

"_Contract?_" Skipper questioned. "When did we have a contract?"

"Come on now, Skipper, you do remember how we assisted with the reconstruction of your airplane in Africa, don't you?" Mason replied. "More thumbs?"

"Ah, but that's over with," Skipper stated. "You _guys_ got your maternity leave, so what else could you possibly want now?"

"Cash would be nice," Mason answered.

Skipper shook his head as he turned to Kowalski.

"Kowalski: Legal analysis!" he declared.

"Sorry, Skipper, I'm not getting involved," Kowalski replied. "This is between you and the International Simian Workers Union."

Skipper then looked back at Mason.

"All right, chimp," he said, "you tell me where Jimmy Hoffa is and I'll make sure you get paid."

* * *

**27.) ****February 27, 2010****: "The Four Forgotten Fortunes"** [4C]

At around 2100 hours, the animals' zoovenir shop meeting was winding down.

"And lastly, before we adjourn, I have something here for the lemurs and Marlene," Mason told the group as he reached behind the box he was sitting on and retrieved four fortune cookies. "After Rico had gotten his 'misfortune cookie' a few days ago, we had all apparently gotten sidetracked and forgot that there were still six cookies left: the four I have now and one each for Phil and I, which we've already eaten."

Marlene then approached Mason to receive her cookie, which she then cracked open and ate. The paper fortune inside she handed to Phil to be read.

"You have a way of finding the good in others," Mason said, interpreting Phil's sign language.

Maurice came up next; these words were found inside his cookie: _Although you toil daily, your efforts shall pay great rewards._ Mort followed; his fortune read: _You find enjoyment in something quite simple._

"And now for the king!" Julien smiled as he took and opened his cookie; the smile turned to a frown when he found nothing inside. "Empty?! How dare I be cheated?! I'm King Julien, and I demand justice!"

* * *

**28.) ****February 28, 2010****: "The Flippered Firearm"**

"Great shot, sir," Kowalski stated after Skipper had fired a golf ball at a bowling pin target, using Rico as a cannon.

"Indeed," Skipper smiled, turning to Private. "Private, you're up next."

Private then took control of Rico, soon lining up his shot on another bowling pin. But just as he was about to shoot, Julien suddenly jumped into the line of fire.

"Hello, neighbors!" he greeted.

"Private, hold your fire!" Skipper shouted, looking next to Julien. "Hey, you've got to watch it, ring-tail! Do you know what might've happened if you had just gotten shot with a golf ball?"

"No," Julien responded.

"Well, you'd live, but you might've gotten a nasty bruise," Skipper answered.

"Ah," Julien responded, not really caring. "Say, can I shoot a golfy ball from the flightless bird?"

"No can do, ring-tail," Skipper replied, pointing at Rico. "You need to pass a background check before you can lay your hands on this weapon."

"What?!" Julien protested. "How dare you! I don't need a background check – I'm a great and highly respected lemur king!"

Skipper chuckled.

"Well, in that case, you _don't_ need a background check," he stated. "I can tell you right now that you're ineligible."

* * *

**29.) ****March 1, 2010****: "The Key to a Confession"**

After being gone for just a moment, Marlene returned to her habitat to find that the cake she had baked and left to cool was gone.

"Is nothing sacred?" she sighed as she headed back out the door, determined to track down whoever had pilfered the cake.

Soon after leaving, Marlene ran into Skipper.

"You haven't seen a chocolate cake around, have you?" she asked.

"That was your cake?!" Skipper asked, shocked. "I just saw ring-tail with one five minutes ago."

"Figures," Marlene muttered as she began walking to the lemur habitat. "Thanks."

Upon arrival, Marlene found Julien lounging on a chair; she approached him to inquire about what Skipper had said.

"You stole my cake, didn't you?" she asked.

"Nope," Julien quickly replied. "Didn't do anything."

"Come on, Julien," she continued, "I can see chocolate frosting on your face."

"Um," Julien responded, wiping his face on his arm. "You're wrong."

"Just confess," Marlene persisted.

"Never!" Julien declared.

"Well, in that case, I'll just have to make you talk," Marlene said, glancing at Julien's feet.

"You don't have the nerve," Julien stated.

"Wanna bet?" Marlene replied, grabbing Julien's feet.

"Fine, I confess!" Julien exclaimed. "Now get off the royal feet!"

* * *

**30.) ****March 2, 2010****: "Flightless on Two Accounts"**

After suiting up in their makeshift flight gear, the penguins were ready to take to the sky.

"All right, let's shake 'em up, boys," Skipper said as he and the others began shaking the soda bottles they had attached to their backs to simulate jetpacks.

After a few moments of shaking, the pressure from the confined carbonated soda should have allowed the otherwise-flightless birds to take flight. But something seemed different this time: Nothing was happening.

"Kowalski, shouldn't we have blasted into the air by now?" Skipper turned to him and asked. "Why are we still on the ground?"

"That's a good question, Skipper," Kowalski responded as he stopped shaking. "Let me have a look."

Kowalski then took off his soda bottle and placed his flipper on the cap. Expecting soda to blast out, he turned his head away as he loosened it; to his surprise, nothing came out.

"Flat soda, huh?" Skipper asked, looking on. "But why?"

Kowalski examined the outside of the bottle, soon finding the answer on the "sell by" date: _January 20, 1981_.

"Decades-old soda looks to be the cause," Kowalski reported. "Sorry, Skipper, but it appears as if we are flightless on two accounts today."

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1C:** This drabble takes place shortly after the episode "The Penguin Stays in the Picture," probably a day or so later. On a technical note, since Skipper didn't realize that the lens cap was still on the camera while taking the pictures, the type of camera used was not a single-lens reflex (SLR) camera, and since the camera took film, it was obviously not any type of digital one either.

**2C:** This drabble takes place directly following the "Dr. Blowhole's Revenge" episode. It suggests that Marlene is more important to Skipper than any of his secrets.

**3C:** In "Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa," Mason and Phil rounded up native chimpanzees to assist with the reconstruction of the crashed airplane, but the chimps soon formed a labor union and went on strike until Skipper granted them maternity leave (despite the fact that all the chimps were guys). As for Jimmy Hoffa, he was the president of the Teamsters Union from 1958 until 1971, but disappeared mysteriously in 1975 – the circumstances of his disappearance are still unknown and are the subject of both humor and various conspiracy theories.

**4C:** This drabble takes place a few days after the "Misfortune Cookie" episode.


	4. March 3 to March 12, 2010

**31.) ****March 3, 2010****: "The Otter and the Oath"** [1D]

Minutes after she had turned down Skipper's offer to become his Secretary of State, Marlene called over to him to reconsider serving in his Cabinet.

"Hey, Skipper, is that Secretary of State position still open?" she called to him from across the room.

"I knew you'd come around," Skipper smiled as he waddled over. "I couldn't possibly think of anyone better than you for the position."

"Thanks, Skipper, that means a lot," Marlene responded. "So, what happens now?"

"Well, as with most offices of the public trust, there's an oath involved," Kowalski answered.

"Kowalski would usually administer it, but I'd like to do this one myself," Skipper said, looking to Marlene. "If you'd raise your right paw, please."

Marlene complied.

"Marlene, do you solemnly swear or sincerely affirm, as the case may be, that you will faithfully execute and discharge your duties and responsibilities, according to law, as Secretary of State of the Penguin Unit of the Central Park Zoo to the best of your ability, so help you God or under the pain of the penalty for perjury or false statement?"

"Huh?" Marlene asked, confused by all the legalism.

"Just say 'I do,'" Skipper smiled.

"I do," Marlene agreed.

* * *

**32.) ****March 4, 2010****: "The Stock Option"** [2D]

After suffering through hours of listening to the lemurs blasting their so-called "music" from their radio one Friday night, Skipper was losing it.

"This is madness, men!" he shouted. "Pure madness!"

"I agree, Skipper," Kowalski replied. "How the lemurs can continuously listen to their music at such a great decibel level without suffering hearing loss is certainly a mystery."

"But whatever can we do about it?" Private asked.

"Kaboom!" Rico grinned, clapping his flippers together. "Yeah! Yeah!"

Kowalski shook his head.

"Actually, I've thought of something," he said. "I could rig a device to override their radio signal and replace it with something they won't enjoy. This will, in turn, cause them to turn their radio off."

"Genius, Kowalski," Skipper praised. "But what will you replace their music with?"

"Oh, leave that one to me," Kowalski smiled as he went to work on his device.

Twenty minutes later, over at the lemur habitat, the party animals were continuing dancing the night away.

"I am the true party king!" Julien declared while continuing his groove.

But suddenly their music was cut-off; a strange man began speaking on the radio.

_"And in business news, it was another mixed week on Wall Street."_

* * *

**33.) ****March 5, 2010****: "The Leaves and the Language"**

"Thank you again for having invited me, your king, to go get a pretzel with you," Julien said as he and the penguins walked back together from having all gotten pretzels in Central Park.

"Well, you're not _my_ king, ring-tail," Skipper said, "but you're welcome."

Suddenly, without warning, a crow flew out of a tree, straight at Julien.

_"Caw! Caw!"_ it squawked as it flew into Julien's crown.

"Hey, hey, wings off the king!" Julien shouted as he tried brushing the bird away.

Moments later, the crow emerged, flying off with a few leaves from the crown in its beak.

"And where do you think you are going with those?!" Julien yelled at the crow.

"Looks like he's using them for his nest," Kowalski answered as the crow landed on a tree branch and began strategically positioning the leaves.

"Well they belong to the king!" Julien declared as he looked to Skipper. "Don't just stand there, penguin, say something bird to him! I want those leaves back!"

"Say something _bird_ to him?" Skipper questioned. "I'm afraid that's out of the question."

"And why is that?" Julien asked.

"Because I speak English, ring-tail," Skipper replied. "It's the only language I know."

* * *

**34.) ****March 6, 2010****: "9.99999"**

"Skipper, how would you describe me?" Marlene approached Skipper and asked one morning.

"Well, you're a little naïve, but still a good friend," Skipper began. "And you're–"

"That's not exactly what I meant, Skipper," Marlene broke-in. "I was more asking about how I look."

"Oh," Skipper replied. "In that case, you have a white face and chest, with mostly brown fur elsewhere. And you're around the same height as me."

"True," Marlene said, "but I was still looking more for _how_ I look. You know, on a scale of one to 10."

"Well, I've said before that you were pretty," Skipper replied. "I guess if I had to put that on a scale I'd give you a 10."

"Oh, Skipper, you only say that because you know me," Marlene replied, blushing. "I was hoping for more of an honest answer."

"OK, you caught me," Skipper sighed. "I can really only give you a 9.99999."

Skipper then extended a flipper and pressed it against a single strand of fur on Marlene's arm.

"If only this one piece of fur wasn't out of place, I could've given you a 10," he smiled while straightening it.

"I'll work on that," Marlene smiled back.

* * *

**35.) ****March 7, 2010****: "Swimming Lesson"** [3D]

"Come on in, Julien, the water's fine," Private said as he and the other penguins swam around in their habitat's pool while Julien nervously looked on.

"Maybe a great and noble lemur king shouldn't be partaking in this thing called 'swimming' after all," Julien said. "I think I ought to leave all the swimming to you flightless birds and your little flippity-flips."

_"Flippity-flips?"_ Skipper questioned. "I think you mean _flippers_, ring-tail. But I did promise you that I'd teach you how to swim, and I'm a bird of my word."

"Swimming is really easy to learn, Julien," Kowalski encouraged as he pulled out his special waterproof abacus and slid some of its beads around. "Statistically, the odds are in your favor."

"Kowalski's right," Skipper said. "Heck, once we let you out of the burlap bag, it'll be a cinch."

"What?!" Julien shouted in a panic.

"I'm only kidding, ring-tail," Skipper chuckled. "Now hurry up and get in."

"Well, all right," Julien said hesitantly as he picked up two orange arm floats and put them on. "Here I come!"

He then jumped into the water with a powerful splash.

"Arm floaties," Skipper chuckled to himself. "My, how the mighty have fallen."

* * *

**36.) ****March 8, 2010****: "Anything?"**

As the penguins stood atop their platform one morning preparing for the day, Julien suddenly popped out from nowhere.

"Greetings, my feathery subjects!" he said with a smile. "I have come to you with a challenge."

_"Challenge?"_ Skipper chuckled. "Anything you can do we can do better, ring-tail."

"Don't bet on it, my friend," Julien stated. "You will be eating the Humboldt pie for sure."

"I think you meant _humble_ pie just then," Kowalski corrected. "The 'Humboldt,' or _Spheniscus humboldti_, is a penguin species found in South America, while the expression 'to eat humble pie' refers to–"

"Kowalski!" Skipper shouted. "Let it go."

Julien then walked between Skipper and Kowalski.

"Eh, I hate to interrupt," he said, "but there is still the matter of my challenge."

"Just name it, ring-tail," Skipper replied. "There is nothing – except flying, I suppose – that penguins can't do."

"Nothing?" Julien asked.

"Read my beak: There is _nothing_ we can't do," Skipper responded with great confidence.

"Good," Julien smirked as he stuck out his right paw. "I challenge you to a thumb wrestling contest."

Skipper's eyes suddenly widened; he then stood silent in shock before soon fainting backwards.

"I guess I win by knockout," Julien smiled.

* * *

**37.) ****March 9, 2010****: "Thanks For Your Support"**

"What's up, guys?" Marlene greeted as she entered the penguins' HQ.

"Hi, Marlene," Skipper said as he quickly hid the piece of paper he was looking at behind his back.

But he was milliseconds too slow – Marlene saw that Skipper was trying to hide something from her.

"So, Skipper," she said, "what have you got there?"

"Oh, it's nothing really," Skipper replied. "Just a boring letter, that's all."

"Cool," Marlene said as she grabbed the letter away from Skipper. "Can I read it?"

"Hey, Marlene, you didn't even give me a chance to say no," Skipper stated.

Marlene then began reading the letter aloud.

_"Dear Mr. S.J. Fidelis,_

_"Thank you for your continued support of our mission to rescue, protect, and rehabilitate otters throughout __North America__. Your financial contribution–"_

"Give me that," Skipper declared, blushing, as he took his letter back. "Don't you know it's a federal offence to take someone else's mail?"

"OK, I'm sorry," Marlene apologized, then smiled. "But that is rather sweet of you to have given money to an otter organization."

"Well, I don't like otter hunting, and I'd really hate to see you turned into a hat," Skipper smiled. "It's the least I can do."

* * *

**38.) ****March 10, 2010****: "Catch of the Day"**

"Today I'm going to catch the biggest fish of all," Private stated as he and the other penguins sat beside the pond in the park with their fishing lines dipped into the water.

"We'll see, soldier," Skipper smiled. "We'll see."

Moments later, Private was startled when there was a sudden jerk on his line.

"Skipper, I've got a bite," Private said as he began reeling in his catch.

"Sure," Skipper replied sarcastically.

"No, Skipper, really," Private stated as his catch began resisting, dragging him forward. "Skipper, help me!"

Skipper then glanced over at Private and noticed the struggle.

"Grab ahold, men!" he declared as he, Kowalski, and Rico all joined in pulling on the line.

With all their combined might, the team soon drug the determined creature at the end of the line onto the shore. But they were all shocked to find out what they had caught – or rather _who_.

_"Pufft!"_ Marlene said as she spit out the hook. "I'm sure glad that's over with."

"Marlene, are you OK?" Skipper asked, concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Marlene assured him. "I just decided to go for a swim and then I got hungry – and I guess you know the rest already."

* * *

**39.) ****March 11, 2010****: "Beginning to Rub Off?"**

"Hey, King Julien, where have you been?" Maurice asked as Julien returned to the lemur habitat after having been gone several hours.

"Oh, just out playing a card game with that flightless commando," Julien replied.

"Skipper?" Maurice asked.

"Yes," Julien answered. "Now I am very tired from using my brain so much when I was competing against the penguin, so bring to me my kingly pillow so that I may take a royal nap – and bring me a cookie and a glass of milk, too."

Maurice then went to retrieve the items Julien had requested and handed them to him; the milk was last.

"What is this, Maurice?!" Julien objected as he took a sip of the milk and spit it out. "This milk is too warm, lower mammal – take it back!"

_"Lower mammal?"_ Maurice questioned. "Your majesty, you do know that you're a mammal, too, don't you?"

"Eh–" Julien began to reply.

"I think you may have been hanging around Skipper just a little too long," Maurice continued. "Some of it's starting to rub off."

"Really?" Julien asked. "You mean I'm starting to smell like fish?"

Maurice quietly chuckled to himself.

"Well," he said, "now that you mention it."

* * *

**40.) ****March 12, 2010****: "Évacuer!"**

_"Evacuate! Evacuate!"_ the penguins' computing device began blaring early in the HQ one morning, startling the force awake from their slumber. _"Evacuate!"_

"Skipper, is this a drill?" Kowalski stuck his head down into Skipper's bunk and inquired. "Or is the dawn of World War III now upon us?"

"Don't panic, men, it's just my error," Skipper stated. "I was planning on having a big drill tomorrow; I guess I set the date wrong on the device, that's all."

Skipper then looked to Rico, who was in the bunk below him.

"Rico, go turn that off," he said.

Rico then waddled across the room and pressed a button on the device, thinking he was turning it off. But it was soon apparent that he had accidentally pressed the wrong one.

_"Évacuer! Évacuer!"_ it began to say in a French accent.

"Rico, what did you do?" Skipper asked, puzzled by the device's new voice.

"It seems he accidentally put it in French mode," Kowalski responded. "I'll fix it."

Kowalski then waddled across the room and took the device from Rico.

"There we go," he said as he pressed a button.

_"Evakuierung!"_ the device declared.

"Or not," Kowalski sighed. "Now it's speaking German!"

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1D:** This drabble takes place minutes after the conclusion of my full-length fan fiction story "Election Day," which took place on November 3, 2009.

**2D:** The events of this drabble were inspired by my participation in a short-lived roleplay thread at the main "Penguins of Madagascar" forum here on this website in late August 2009, where I played Kowalski and had him begin to build the signal interrupter. By mid-September, however, the thread fell into disuse.

**3D:** Although an interesting story in its own right, the idea for this drabble also stems from a scene in my full-length "Election Day" fanfic.


	5. March 13 to March 22, 2010

**41.) ****March 13, 2010****: "Skipper's Biggest Fan?"** [1E]

"Oh, hello, Skipper," Marlene stuttered while shoving the piece of paper she was writing on under a book as Skipper entered her habitat. "Can I help you?"

"Well, you could start by letting me see that classified information you're trying to hide from me," Skipper replied as he lifted up the book Marlene had stashed the paper under, finding several other papers there as well.

"No, Skipper, those are–" Marlene began, but Skipper had already picked them up.

_"Captain Skipper and the Popcorn Panic,"_ Skipper said, reading the first paper's title. "Should I go on, Marlene, or would you like to explain this?"

"OK, Skipper," she began, "sometimes I like to write about the missions you've gone on. That one is about when you worked on getting all of us popcorn."

Skipper then skimmed through some of the other titles: _Captain Skipper the Eggysitter; Captain Skipper and the Lemur Robot; Captain Skipper and the Raccoon Thief._

Then one title caught his attention: _Captain Skipper and the __New York__ Sailboat Race._

"What's with this one?" Skipper asked, holding it up. "I've never been in a sailboat race."

Marlene blushed.

"Oh, I made that one up," she replied. "It's called _fan fiction_."

* * *

**42.) ****March 14, 2010****: "Pi Day"**

Kowalski always held March 14 as a major holiday.

"So, does anyone know what today is?" he excitedly asked the group of animals who had gathered for a morning zoovenir shop meeting.

"Um, Sunday?" Marlene responded.

"Besides that," Kowalski said. "OK, I'll tell you – it's Pi Day!"

"I like pie!" Mort stated with delight.

"Yes, I also like pie," Julien added. "So, tell me, smart penguin, do you have any pie for me, the king?"

"Better," Kowalski replied as he reached behind his back. "I have a piece of pi for everybody."

He then pulled out several small strips of paper that had numbers written on them and began distributing them, beginning with himself with the numbers 3.141592653.

"This pie tastes terrible!" Julien objected as he took a nibble of his numbers, 1693993751. "You are a very bad baker!"

"Pi Day isn't about baked goods, Julien," Kowalski responded. "March 14, or 3/14, is about celebrating _pi_, the mathematical formula for finding the circumference of a circle based on its diameter."

"Well I like it!" Mort giggled as he dipped his paper in chocolate sauce. "The numbers 4592307816 sure are yummy!"

"Mort?" Kowalski asked puzzledly. "Where did you get the chocolate?"

* * *

**43.) ****March 15, 2010****: "Coinage"**

As the penguins and lemurs walked across the zoo together, Kowalski suddenly spotted something round and shiny on the ground.

"Ooh, a quarter," he said as he bent down to pick it up. "Oh, and it's a state quarter, too – a Hawaii! Guess what, everybody? My collection of all 50 state quarters is now complete!"

"Say, smart penguin, could I see that quarter?" Julien asked.

"I guess," Kowalski answered as he handed it to Julien. "Just don't lose it."

Julien then looked at the back of the quarter, then glanced at the front.

"Who's this guy?" Julien asked as he pointed at the portrait of George Washington on the coin.

"That would be George Washington," Kowalski replied. "The first president of the United States."

"Washington?" Julien asked. "Why couldn't it be me, the king?"

"Because you need to be considered important in the United States to be put on coinage," Kowalski answered. "And you need to be deceased."

"Dead?" Julien said. "But that is not fair!"

"I hear you, brother," Skipper spoke up. "I wish you were on the penny."

"Why the penny?" Julien inquired.

"Well, ring-tail," Skipper answered, "have you ever seen those machines that crush designs into pennies?"

* * *

**44.) ****March 16, 2010****: "Another Day, Another Egg"** [2E]

"Um, guys, you're not going to believe this, but I've found another egg," Marlene said as she walked into the penguins' HQ one morning, carefully cradling an egg in her paws.

"In your habitat?" Skipper asked as he waddled over to her. "I'll tell you, Marlene, that duck has got to keep better track of her eggs. We can't be babysitting every day of the–"

"No," Marlene broke-in. "This one I found just outside of your habitat."

"Marlene!" Kowalski said as he took the egg from her. "I think you may have just found my missing egg."

"Wait – what?" Marlene asked, confused.

"But just to make sure," Kowalski said as he held the egg up to his ear and tapped on it with a flipper. "Ah, yes, this is the one."

He then waddled over to a frying pan and prepared to crack the egg open.

"Hold on, Kowalski!" Marlene spoke up in a panic. "Have you completely lost it?"

Kowalski chuckled as he proceeded to crack the egg.

"Don't worry, Marlene, there's no bird inside of this one – I checked," he said as he plopped the egg into the frying pan. "Now can I interest you in some breakfast?"

* * *

**45.) ****March 17, 2010****: "Wearing of the Green"**

As Julien went about his royal stroll through the zoo, he was taken by surprise when he neared the penguin habitat and noticed that each of the penguins' white feathers were green.

"Are you silly penguins OK?" he asked as he climbed into their enclosure and met with them on their platform. "Or have you all come down with seasickness?"

"We're good, ring-tail," Skipper chuckled as he pointed at his chest with a flipper. "We all just dyed our feathers green with Gatorade to celebrate St. Patrick's Day today."

"St. Patrick's Day?" Julien questioned. "Since when are you penguins Irish?"

"Everybody's a little bit Irish on St. Patrick's Day, ring-tail," Skipper replied. "Even if you're not the other 364 days of the year."

"Indeed," Kowalski agreed. "And that's why we're all wearing green today – because it's a tradition."

Skipper then grinned as an idea entered his mind.

"And do you know what else is a tradition, ring-tail?" he asked. "Pinching those who forget to wear green – and you're not wearing any."

Skipper then turned to Rico.

"Rico, would you like to have the honors?" he asked.

"Don't you dare pinch the royal me!" Julien yelled as he took off running.

* * *

**46.) ****March 18, 2010****: "Checkmates"**

Even though he won every time, Skipper always enjoyed playing a good game of chess with Marlene. But this time the unthinkable was about to happen: Marlene was one move away from winning.

"Marlene, look, a ladybug!" Skipper said as he pointed behind Marlene with a flipper.

When Marlene turned around to take a look at it, Skipper turned the chessboard halfway around so that his and Marlene's pieces were now reversed.

"Skipper, there's no ladybug," Marlene said as she turned back around.

"Oh, my mistake," Skipper replied as he picked up one of Marlene's chess pieces and moved it as his own. "Checkmate, Marlene. Looks like I've won again."

Marlene scratched her head.

"Wait a minute, the black pieces are mine," she said.

"No, no," Skipper stuttered. "The white ones are."

Marlene rolled her eyes.

"Skipper, I know you get up really early in the morning for training, but you've got to get up even earlier if you want to pull a fast one on me," she chuckled.

"OK, you got me," Skipper said as he turned the chessboard back the right way. "Go ahead, make your move."

"Checkmate," Marlene said, moving her piece.

"Congratulations, Marlene," Skipper said. "Well-done."

* * *

**47.) ****March 19, 2010****: "Reverse Formation"**

"Kowalski, remind me how this little experiment of yours is supposed to go," Skipper turned to his first lieutenant and requested.

"We reverse ranks and roles for 24 hours," Kowalski responded. "You are now Private, and Private is now you. And I will switch with Rico."

"And this will aid in your research?" Skipper continued, still a little unsure.

"Affirmative," Kowalski smiled. "It will help me prove a theory on how personality relates to brain activity."

"All right," Skipper said. "So, since I'm supposed to be like Private now, what am I supposed to do?"

Private then waddled over to Skipper and slapped him.

"You'll catch on soon enough, soldier!" Private said. "Now drop and give me 20 on the double!"

Meanwhile, Rico, acting as Kowalski, began pouring chemicals into test tubes while Kowalski grabbed a stick of dynamite.

"Let's see, how hard can it be?" he asked to himself as he began to place the dynamite in his mouth. "Just swallow it like a fish – Rico does this all the time."

But just as he was about to try swallowing the dynamite, an explosion occurred across the room from mismatched chemicals.

"Maybe this wasn't a good idea," Kowalski sighed.

* * *

**48.) ****March 20, 2010****: "Near-Broiled"**

"Well, I think I've had enough for now," Kowalski said as he got up from laying underneath the heat lamps with the other penguins on their platform.

"Me, too," Private said as he got up and joined Kowalski.

"Uh-huh," Rico agreed, standing up as well.

"Well, I'm going to stay for a bit more," Skipper said to his men. "You boys go on back inside and I'll join you shortly."

Kowalski, Rico, and Private then climbed down the ladder to go back into the HQ, leaving their leader alone to tan. All was well for 10 minutes until Skipper fell asleep.

"Maurice, where is that smell of chicken coming from?" Julien asked from atop his throne.

But before Maurice could answer, Julien spotted Skipper under the heat lamps in the next habitat.

"Oh no!" he exclaimed as he leapt from his throne. "My flightless neighbor has begun to broil! Hang on, my flippered friend!"

When he reached the penguin habitat, Julien scooped up a handful of water and threw it at Skipper to cool him off.

"What the?" Skipper said, startled awake. "Ring-tail, what happened?"

"Oh, nothing much," Julien replied. "Just me saving you from becoming a McNugget, that's all."

* * *

**49.) ****March 21, 2010****: "Single Gumball Theory"** [3E]

"My royal fur is a royal mess!" Julien complained as he entered the penguins' HQ.

"Your fur?" Maurice, following close behind, wondered. "Have you even seen how bad mine is?"

"Hold on, lemurs, I'm confused," Skipper turned to them and said. "Someone fill me in."

"Well, what happened was some foolish child threw a chewed gumball at the royal me, that's what," Julien replied, pointing to his sticky fur. "And then some of it bounced off of me onto Maurice."

"Well, you two are certainly a mess," Skipper commented. "Are you sure that just one gumball caused all that?"

"Theoretically, it's possible," Kowalski said, waddling over.

He then pulled out a laser pointer and focused it on Julien's right shoulder.

"The wad of gum hit here first," Kowalski declared. "Then, because of wind from the south, it blew onto your left elbow next, leaving a sticky strand across your chest in the process. It then proceeded to ricochet at a 45° angle until it made contact with Maurice's right ear, then it tumbled downward to his right foot. Startled, Maurice kicked it upward, causing the wad to transfer back to you."

Kowalski continued on like this for 12 more minutes.

* * *

**50.) ****March 22, 2010****: "We'll Have to Improvise"**

A day after they had spotted a crack on the side of their habitat's platform, the penguins assembled to repair it.

"Kowalski, go with Rico and bring up the bag of concrete mix from the HQ," Skipper stated as he stood on top of the platform with the others. "And Private, you go fetch us a wheelbarrow so we can mix up the concrete when Kowalski and Rico get back."

Kowalski, Rico, and Private then waddled away to retrieve their assigned items. Kowalski and Rico soon returned carefully carrying a 40-pound bag of dry concrete mix in their flippers, but Private was taking a bit longer trying to locate a wheelbarrow.

"Sorry, sir," Private apologized when he came back 15 minutes later. "I couldn't find a wheelbarrow anywhere."

"Well, I guess we'll have to improvise," Skipper responded, looking to Rico. "That's why we have Rico here."

Skipper then tore open the concrete bag and scooped out a small shovelful.

"Say _aah_, Rico," he said as he neared the shovel to Rico's mouth. "We're going to have to mix this stuff inside of you, buddy. Just make sure to keep moving around so that the concrete won't harden in your gut."

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1E:** The idea for this drabble (especially its ending line, "It's called _fan fiction_") was based on a scene from the "Mr. Monk and His Biggest Fan" episode of the television show "Monk," in which a fanatical fan of the titular character created things based on the former detective's cases, including one which she simply made up and described as "fan fiction."

**2E:** The "first" egg that Marlene found was reportedly found in her habitat in the "Paternal Egg-Stinct" episode. As for if it is appropriate or not for a penguin to consume bird eggs, the "Happy King Julien Day!" episode showed them to be using eggs while baking a cake, thus suggesting that it is OK. And lastly, it goes without saying that Kowalski obviously did not lay the egg featured in this drabble – he must have merely lost it somewhere until Marlene found it.

**3E:** This drabble is a "Penguins of Madagascar"-themed version of the Single Bullet Theory. I am not the first to use the theory as the base for parody – the 1992 "Seinfeld" episode "The Boyfriend, Part 1" also did a rendition.


	6. March 23 to April 1, 2010

**51.) ****March 23, 2010****: "Haven't Swum in a Week"** [1F]

"Hello, Kowalski!" Marlene called out from her habitat as Kowalski waddled by one afternoon.

"Hello," Kowalski stopped to say as he waved a flipper at her. "Well, it's a nice day today. A great day to take a swim, am I right?"

"Actually, Kowalski," Marlene responded, "I haven't done any swimming in about a week."

"A week?" Kowalski wondered. "But you're an otter. Do you mind if I ask why?"

"Well, the water here in my pond isn't too clean," Marlene answered as she pointed to it. "I want to swim again, but I don't want to swim around in water that's been contaminated."

Kowalski then entered Marlene's enclosure and stood at the edge of the water.

"The water looks fine to me, Marlene," he reported. "What's the contaminant?"

Marlene sighed.

"Well, you remember that walrus that was here last week?" Marlene asked.

"Yeah," Kowalski replied.

"Well, let's just say she took matters into her own hands when she found out that my pond wasn't a Jacuzzi," Marlene continued. "Actually, I shouldn't even say 'hands'; when she added her own bubbles, she was more using–"

"I see where you're going," Kowalski broke-in. "But don't worry, I have plenty of chlorine."

* * *

**52.) ****March 24, 2010****: "The Boots"** [2F]

"Mort!" Julien yelled as he stood on his throne. "How many times must I tell you not to touch my royal feet?!"

"Ah–" Mort began.

"I didn't actually want an answer, Mort," Julien stated as he sat back down. "All I want is peace from your foot-touching."

Julien then sighed to himself as he reached next to his throne and grabbed a pair of boots.

"So, it has come to this, hasn't it?" he said to himself as he began to put the boots on his feet. "But I guess it's for the better."

"What's with the boots, King Julien?" Maurice then walked over and asked. "Goin' for a new look?"

"No, Maurice," Julien replied. "These boots are an investment against Mort's foot-touching."

"I see," Maurice responded. "Mort can't touch your feet when they're inside the boots."

"Ah, not quite," Julien stated. "I'm only going to keep my feet inside long enough to get them good and stinky, then Mort won't want to go near them. Those silly penguins told me they did something similar with one of Alice's boots."

"But, King Julien, why not just _wear_ the boots?" Maurice asked.

"What?!" Julien questioned. "These boots don't match my eyes!"

* * *

**53.) ****March 25, 2010****: "The Pudding Prank"** [3F]

"Oh, it smells so good!" Julien said as Kowalski placed a bowl of chocolate pudding in front of him. "Thank you, silly penguins, for inviting the royal me to share some pudding with you."

"Oh, sure," Skipper smiled as he handed Julien a spoon. "Here you are."

Julien then placed the spoon into the pudding and scooped some out to eat.

"And it tastes delicious!" he said as he took a bite.

Suddenly, Private began to chuckle.

"Quiet, Private," Skipper whispered. "It's not time yet."

"Not time for what?" Julien asked, overhearing.

"Oh, nothing," Skipper replied as he turned away from Julien. "You just keep enjoying that pudding, ring-tail."

But Julien began to suspect that something was up.

"You are keeping something from me, aren't you?!" Julien shouted. "Tell me now, I command you!"

"Fine, ring-tail, but it's nothing that important," Skipper answered. "It's just that you're using the teaspoon I buried Manfredi and Johnson with, that's all."

_"Pufft!"_ Julien said, spitting the pudding in his mouth onto the floor and beginning to lunge at Skipper. "How dare you! I will get you for sure!"

"Ring-tail!" Skipper yelled as he backed away. "It was all just a joke, I swear!"

* * *

**54.) ****March 26, 2010****: "Oysters on Half Shells"** [4F]

"I had a great time celebrating my birthday with everybody tonight," Marlene said to Skipper as he walked her back to her habitat following her big bash at the zoovenir shop.

"I'm glad you did, Marlene," Skipper said. "But there's one more thing I have for you inside."

They both then entered Marlene's habitat, and immediately Marlene's eyes were drawn to her table.

"Aww, a bouquet of oysters on half shells arranged to spell out my name," she said, smiling. "Skipper, you shouldn't have."

"Well, I'm glad you like them," Skipper smiled back as he turned around to leave. "Anyway, enjoy them and have a good night."

"No, Skipper, don't go," Marlene said. "You can share the oysters with me."

"Marlene, they're all yours," Skipper replied.

"Come on, I insist," Marlene said as she walked up to her table.

She then took the oysters that formed the "MAR" part of her name and rearranged them to read "SKI." She left them right next to the other oysters she hadn't rearranged.

"What's a _Skilene_?" Skipper asked, looking at the rearranged oyster pattern.

"Part of your name, part of mine," Marlene replied. "You eat the _SKI_ oysters; I'll eat the _LENE_ ones."

* * *

**55.) ****March 27, 2010****: "We've Got a Flat"**

As Private drove the other penguins around the zoo on an afternoon drive in their car, a flapping sound began coming from the left rear tire.

"What's going on, Private?" Skipper asked from the back seat. "You're never going to upgrade from your learner's permit if you damage our car."

"It wasn't me, Skipper," Private replied as he pulled over. "I think one of the tires may be flat."

All four then exited the car and went to investigate.

"Well, we've got a flat, boys," Skipper stated as he looked at the tire, then to Rico. "Rico, do you think you can blow it up?"

"Can do!" Rico mumbled happily as he hacked-up a stick of dynamite. "Kaboom!"

"No, Rico, no kaboom!" Skipper shouted. "I meant blow it up with air."

"Oh," Rico said, disappointed, as he re-swallowed the explosive.

He then bent down beside the tire and wrapped his bill around the valve stem. Next, he took a deep breath and began to re-inflate the tire.

Unfortunately, Rico soon lost track of how much air he had put in as the tire exploded with a bang.

_Kaboom!_

"My ears!" Private yelled.

"My tire!" Skipper exclaimed.

"My bad," Rico apologized.

* * *

**56.) ****March 28, 2010****: "Tricky"**

"Have any of you boys seen my coffee mug?" Skipper asked his team one afternoon after searching for it around the HQ.

"I think you left it outside, Skipper," Private responded.

"Thanks, Private," Skipper said as he waddled over to the ladder to go retrieve it.

But when he reached the top, Skipper saw that it was not safe to go outside because Alice was there.

"What in the world?" Alice questioned out loud as she bent down to pick up Skipper's coffee mug.

"What have you got there, Alice?" a male co-worker called over to her as he walked by.

"It's a coffee mug," Alice replied as she held it up for him to see. "I've always thought these penguins were tricky."

"_The penguins?_" the other zookeeper questioned.

"Yeah," Alice replied. "And that flat-headed one is the trickiest one of them all."

The male zookeeper chuckled, clearly not taking Alice seriously.

"Oh, sure, Alice, the penguins drink coffee every morning," he said sarcastically. "They probably even have their own coffee maker and dip a fish into their coffee for flavor. Heck, they probably even talk, too."

"Don't you mock me!" Alice chastised. "I really think these penguins are off!"

* * *

**57.) ****March 29, 2010****: "Dream or Nightmare?"** [5F]

"Kowalski, do you think that Skipper's OK?" Private asked as he and Kowalski observed their leader chuckling in his sleep and slapping his flippers around.

"I'm not sure, Private," Kowalski replied. "I don't think that Skipper is having a seizure, but it would appear that he is having some sort of psychological episode."

The two continued watching as Skipper began thrashing more aggressively. When he turned towards them, they could clearly see a wide smile across Skipper's face – whatever he was doing, he was certainly enjoying it.

"Do you think we should wake him up?" Private asked.

Suddenly, before Kowalski could reply, Skipper began to talk in his sleep.

"Your little protest march is over!" he yelled with passion and authority. "Cut your hair and get a job!"

He then laughed deeply.

"Lose the tie-dye and learn to love capitalism!" he shouted as he began slapping with greater ferocity.

"OK, Private," Kowalski said, "wake him up before he hurts himself."

"Wake up, sir," Private then said, tapping Skipper's shoulder.

"Who?! What?! Where?!" Skipper shouted, startled awake.

"Are you OK, Skipper?" Private asked.

"Private!" Skipper exclaimed. "I was dreaming about finally getting to slap the hippies and you just ruined it!"

* * *

**58.) ****March 30, 2010****: "What's a Hug Worth?"**

"Anyway, Marlene, I'm glad that you're feeling better now," Skipper said after he had solved the problem Marlene had sought his assistance on. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"

Marlene thought it over for a moment.

"I know it's a silly little request, Skipper," she said, "but could I get a hug?"

"From me?" Skipper asked. "I can't see how that's worth anything."

"Actually, Skipper, it's worth quite a lot," Marlene replied.

"How so?" Skipper inquired.

"Well, because you're someone who puts a lot of effort and passion into everything you do," Marlene replied. "You so rarely hug anybody, so it matters a lot when you do."

"Really?" Skipper asked.

"Really," Marlene said. "Because you so rarely do it, you always put your whole heart into it."

Skipper then reached out and gave Marlene the hug she had wanted.

"So, Marlene, how am I doing?" he asked as he continued to hug her.

"You're doing great," Marlene replied. "You're a much better hugger than you think you are. And you have a good heart."

"That's what the doctor said at my last check-up," Skipper smiled. "He's a needle-sticking demon, but I guess he got that one right."

* * *

**59.) ****March 31, 2010****: "An Alternative Use"**

"I can't take it anymore!" Julien yelled out to no one in particular as he pulled a finger out of his mouth. "I have been tortured to the brink of a royal breakdown!"

He then noticed the penguins waddling by.

"You there, come help your king!" he shouted to them. "I need to have a dollar!"

"No can do, ring-tail," Skipper replied. "Earn your own money."

"Then I, as king, impose a one-dollar tax on you," Julien declared. "So pay up."

"Julien, you have no authority to tax us," Kowalski replied. "No law exists permitting self-appointed lemur kings to tax penguins."

"Please, I beg you!" Julien pleaded. "Help me, I'm losing my mind!"

"I think it's already lost," Skipper joked. "But fine, ring-tail, if it matters that much, you can have a dollar."

Rico then hacked-up a one-dollar bill and walked up to hand it to Julien.

"Thank you," Julien said as he accepted the bill and slid its top edge between two of his teeth. "Ah, sweet relief!"

"Ring-tail, what are you doing?!" Skipper questioned, puzzled.

"I had a piece of popcorn stuck between my teeth for a week," Julien replied. "And now it's gone. Thank you, my friends!"

* * *

**60.) ****April 1, 2010****: "A Change in Operation?"**

When the other penguins got up in the morning, they found that Skipper was already up and working hard at the table.

"Well, you're up early," Private commented as he, Kowalski, and Rico waddled over. "What are you working on, Skipper?"

"Boys, I've given it a lot of thought, and I've decided that we need to make a few changes to our operation," he replied. "I think we need to look to the lemurs as role models for how to run a group."

"_The lemurs?_" Kowalski asked, confused.

"Oh, yeah, Kowalski," Skipper replied. "King Julien has great leadership skills – we should all try to emulate ring-tail's spotless image."

Private then tapped a flipper on Skipper's shoulder.

"Are you all right, sir?" he asked.

"I'm great, Private," Skipper replied with a smile.

"I meant in the head, Skipper," Private continued. "Are you _really_ saying we should be more like the lemurs, or have you bumped your head or something?"

"Of course I'm serious," Skipper responded. "I really think they've got it all together, plus their parties are always the best."

Skipper then looked to his men and smiled.

"Gotcha!" he chuckled as he pointed a flipper at them. "April Fools', boys!"

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1F:** This drabble takes place a week after the "Roomies" episode.

**2F:** The "similar" event which Julien refers to was when the penguins shoved Mort into one of Alice's stinky boots in the "Two Feet High and Rising" episode.

**3F:** This drabble plays off of Skipper having mentioned that he had allegedly buried his deceased former colleagues Manfredi and Johnson with a teaspoon in the episode "The Hidden."

**4F:** "A bouquet of oysters on half shells arranged to spell out her name" is something that Marlene let slip that she desired in the "Monkey Love" episode. Also, for reference, this is indeed the date I have invented to be Marlene's date of birth. She was born (at least within my own realm of continuity) on March 26, 1992 in Monterey, California. Happy birthday, Marlene!

**5F:** This drabble stems from Skipper's desire to travel back in time to slap hippies in the "It's About Time" episode.


	7. April 2 to April 11, 2010

**61.) ****April 2, 2010****: "Hans"** [1G]

As a new group of visitors approached the penguin habitat, Skipper gave the order to the others to begin displaying their adorable antics.

"All right, boys," he said, "these folks came to see penguins, so let's show 'em what we've got."

All four then began showing off their skills, and they put on quite a show. Skipper slid on his belly. Private dove into the water. Kowalski waddled. Rico danced.

Soon, many of the visitors began snapping photos of the penguins. This was typical, so Skipper thought nothing of it. But suddenly he began to panic.

"Rico, shield me," Skipper stated as he ducked behind Rico. "Make sure I can't be seen."

"Huh?" Rico turned around to ask Skipper, confused by his leader's strange behavior.

"No, Rico," Skipper said. "Turn back around. Just don't let me be seen."

"Skipper, at this zoo you're considered a public figure," Kowalski said. "Why do you not want your picture taken?"

"Well, did you see the man in the blue jacket?" Skipper asked. "Did you see his name tag?"

"Hans," Kowalski replied, reading the name tag. "So?"

"_Hans_ is a Danish name," Skipper responded. "I think the Danes may have finally tracked me down!"

* * *

**62.) ****April 3, 2010****: "The Crossword Puzzle"**

"All right, boys, I need an eight-letter word for 'delight and satisfaction,'" Skipper called out as he looked at the crossword puzzle he was working on.

"Kablamo!" Rico suggested.

"That's seven letters, Rico," Skipper said.

"How about _pleasure_?" Kowalski responded.

"Perfect fit, Kowalski," Skipper replied as he wrote the word in. "OK, now I need the ninth U.S. president. It's 20 letters and begins with a–"

"William Henry Harrison," Kowalski spoke up before Skipper could finish his sentence.

"Oh, well-done, Kowalski," Skipper said as he filled in the answer on the puzzle. "Next, we need a 10-letter word–"

"Pentaprism," Kowalski answered.

"Ah, Kowalski," Skipper said, "I didn't even read the full clue yet."

"Oh, sorry," Kowalski apologized. "Go ahead and read it."

"A 10-letter word – the clue is 'single-lens reflex camera,'" Skipper said.

"Pentaprism," Kowalski replied again.

Skipper rolled his eyes, but wrote Kowalski's correct answer down.

"Next up, a–" Skipper began.

"Potassium nitrate," Kowalski called out.

"Kowalski–" Skipper tried saying.

"Just try it," Kowalski interrupted. "Does it fit?"

Skipper looked at the puzzle, and sure enough it worked, so he wrote it in.

"Next–" Skipper began.

"Massachusetts," Kowalski said.

"Here," Skipper stated, handing Kowalski the puzzle. "You finish it."

* * *

**63.) ****April 4, 2010****: "The Easter Egg"**

"Eh, would you mind telling me what kind of bird laid this fancy-looking egg?" Julien asked as he walked into the penguins' HQ, carrying a blue egg with green stripes and red polka dots. "Or have the sky spirits finally rewarded me with J.J. II?"

"Hey, that's mine," Skipper stated as he took the egg from Julien.

"_Really?_" Julien asked, puzzled. "I've always thought you were a guy. But congratulations nonetheless."

"I _am_ a guy, ring-tail!" Skipper corrected. "It's not _mine_, mine, and besides, this egg is made of plastic. But I did hide it."

"Hide it?" Julien asked. "But why?"

"Well, today's Easter," Skipper replied. "Haven't you ever heard of an Easter egg hunt?"

"Oh, yes," Julien replied. "The silly humans hide eggs and have children find them. Sometimes the eggs are even filled with chocolate."

Julien then looked at the egg in Skipper's flippers and snatched it back.

"So, what's inside of this one?" he asked as he began to pull it open.

"You fool!" Skipper shouted. "That one's packed with C-4!"

"What?!" Julien exclaimed as he tossed the egg back to Skipper.

"Chocolate is outdated," Skipper replied. "We penguins give each other real gifts for the holidays."

* * *

**64.) ****April 5, 2010****: "Classified"**

"So, anything good in the news today, Skipper?" Marlene asked as she entered the penguins' HQ and noticed Skipper holding a newspaper in his flippers.

"Oh, this?" Skipper asked as he lifted the paper up. "I couldn't tell you, Marlene, this is classified."

"Classified?" Marlene questioned, a little frustrated, as she walked up to Skipper. "Come on, Skipper, it's not classified."

"Oh, but it is," Skipper responded.

"No, it isn't," Marlene persisted. "I could go right now and get a copy of that same newspaper from the zoovenir shop. It's not classified."

"Marlene, I'm not kidding, this really is classified," Skipper stated. "I have no reason to make this stuff up."

Marlene rolled her eyes.

"OK, Skipper," she said as she sat down next to him, "if that paper really is classified, prove it."

Skipper smiled.

"Read it and weep, sister," he said as he turned the paper towards Marlene and pointed to the top of the page with a flipper. "This here is the classified section."

Marlene stared at Skipper for a moment.

"Classified advertising?" she asked. "All this fuss over the classified advertising section?"

"Yeah," Skipper replied with a smile. "What did you think I meant by _classified_?"

* * *

**65.) ****April 6, 2010****: "To Touch a Penguin"**

"Aww, these penguins are so cute!" a young girl said as she stood outside of the penguin habitat with her mother. "I'd give anything to pet one."

All four penguins then smiled as they continued to wave at the guests.

"Hey, Skipper," Private said, "do you think I could go up to the edge and let that little girl pet me?"

"Negatory," Skipper responded. "It goes against zoo rules."

"But, Skipper," Private continued, "doesn't almost everything else we do go against zoo rules already?"

"Well–" Skipper began.

"I'm doing it," Private stated as he dove into the water.

After swimming to the wall, Private got out of the water and climbed up on the ledge next to the gate that surrounded the penguin enclosure.

"Aww," the girl said as she began to reach for Private, but she was quickly stopped by her mother.

"Don't touch the animals, sweetie," she said.

"Oh, that's no fair – give the girl a chance!" Skipper said, looking then to Rico. "Rico: Diversion!"

Rico then began making bizarre sound effects in order to distract the young girl's mother. When the mother turned away, the girl patted Private on the head.

"I love you, penguin," she whispered.

* * *

**66.) ****April 7, 2010****: "Quest for the Impossible"**

On a morning which he had allowed himself and his team to sleep in a little later on, Skipper suddenly awoke to the sounds of banging and crashing coming from across the HQ.

"Whoever's there, be forewarned!" Skipper shouted as he jumped out of his bunk. "I've got flippers, and I know how to use them!"

"It's only me, Skipper," Kowalski responded from across the room. "I just wanted to get a jump on my perpetual motion machine."

"Perpetual motion?" Skipper questioned. "Surely you know that's scientifically impossible."

"So was time travel until–" Kowalski began.

"Yeah," Skipper broke-in, "until you nearly destroyed the world."

"Well, I've still got to try," Kowalski continued. "Just imagine all the benefits to humanity and penguinity if there really existed a device which, once set into motion, continued to move for eternity."

Kowalski then resumed working on his latest contraption, and moments later, Skipper waddled over to take a closer look.

"You don't know how to quit, do you?" Skipper asked.

"Nope," Kowalski replied.

"Then it would appear that I've been wrong about something," Skipper continued. "Perpetual motion does exist."

"How so?" Kowalski asked.

"It's inside of you, Kowalski," Skipper replied. "You'll keep going forever."

* * *

**67.) ****April 8, 2010****: "Who Says a Lemur Can't Fly?"**

"OK, my subjects," Julien said as he pulled out three two-liter bottles of soda. "I've seen how those silly penguins 'fly' using bottles of soda; we must not let them have an edge over us any longer."

Julien then handed one of the bottles to Maurice.

"You sure about this, King Julien?" he asked as he began strapping the bottle on. "And how come you're making me test this out first?"

"Because I'm much too important to be a test pilot," Julien responded. "What if something happened to me?"

"To you?" Maurice questioned. "If something happens to me, you'll be left with Mort!"

"Scary thought," Julien shuddered. "But I'll take my chances. Now shake your booty and blast off, Maurice!"

Maurice then shook a little to build up the carbonation in the bottle, and soon the cap shot off. But the cap was the only thing to launch; Maurice remained grounded.

"Oh, Maurice, you are too heavy!" Julien stated. "You best be cutting down on the sweets!"

Julien then brought another soda bottle to Mort.

"Wait, your majesty," Maurice spoke up, "I may be too heavy, but Mort's so light he might launch to the moon."

"Your point?" Julien asked.

* * *

**68.) ****April 9, 2010****: "You're in the Army Now"**

"Guys, come quickly – a swarm of angry locusts has begun to hover over the zoo," Marlene entered the penguins' HQ shortly after the zoo had closed and reported.

"Angry locusts – are there any other kind?" Skipper asked, then looked to his team. "All right, men, we've got a job to do. Kowalski, Rico, you come with me and we'll start the attack. Private, you go round up some more soldiers – we need all the manpower we can get on this assault."

"Well, thanks for your prompt action," Marlene said as she turned around to leave.

"Wait, Marlene, I said I needed all the manpower I can get," Skipper stated. "And I also need you – you'll be on the frontlines."

"But I thought females weren't allowed to serve on the frontlines," Marlene replied.

"This isn't the Army, this is my zoo," Skipper smiled. "Besides, those locusts won't go down without a fight, so I'm going to require your service."

"Require?" Marlene questioned. "Can you do that?"

"Sure can, Mammal First Class – I just reinstated the draft," Skipper stated as he pulled Marlene by the arm. "You're in the Army now."

"But I thought you said this wasn't the Army," Marlene replied.

* * *

**69.) ****April 10, 2010****: "The Coffee Conspiracy"**

On a morning that Skipper planned on having an even more rigorous training session, Private woke up wishing for a more relaxing day.

"Oh, Kowalski, I wish we could just take it easy today," Private said as he popped his head into Kowalski's bunk. "But Skipper has other plans."

"I agree, Private," Kowalski replied. "I'd much rather be finishing my work on a few formulas."

Kowalski then peered across the room to the coffee maker and smiled as an idea came to him.

"Hey, Private," Kowalski looked back to Private and said, "do you know if Skipper had his morning coffee yet?"

"I don't think so," Private replied. "Why?"

"Oh, just leave that to me," Kowalski replied as he got up and waddled over to the coffee maker, soon beginning to fiddle around with it.

Minutes later, Skipper waddled in from outside and noticed Kowalski standing by the coffee maker. Rather than draw attention to himself, Kowalski poured Skipper a full cup.

As Skipper took the cup and began to drink it, Kowalski returned to Private.

"What did you do to Skipper's coffee?" Private wondered.

"Oh, nothing sinister, I assure you," Kowalski whispered. "I just made it decaf, that's all."

* * *

**70.) ****April 11, 2010****: "The Splinter"**

"Oh, my foot!" Julien yelled from the lemur habitat. "I'm in royal agony!"

Luckily, Skipper and Marlene happened to be walking nearby, so they rushed to the lemur enclosure upon hearing Julien's cries.

"Oh, silly penguin and the otter, thank goodness you've come!" Julien stated as Skipper and Marlene approached him. "I've gotten a splinter in my kingly king foot and I don't know what to do!"

"Well, you could try pulling it out," Marlene suggested with a smile.

"No, I can't do that," Julien replied. "I'm too nervous to do it myself."

"Well, I bet sad eyes would be willing," Skipper stated, then began calling for Mort. "Hey, Mort, your king needs you."

"Um, Mort and Maurice are away getting candy," Julien responded. "I'm all alone."

"Well, I don't have tweezers, ring-tail," Skipper replied. "What do you want me to do?"

"I'll do it," Marlene stated as she bent down and easily removed Julien's splinter. "See, all better now."

"Oh, well-done, Marlene," Skipper said.

"All in a day's work," Marlene smiled, raising her paw to high-five Skipper. "Up high, Skipper!"

"I'll take a rain check," Skipper replied. "I don't know where your hands have been; well, actually I do."

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Drabble Note**

**1G:** I chose "Hans" to be the name of the "man in the blue jacket" because it was the only name of Danish connection that I could think of at the time I wrote this drabble. There is no connection between this Hans and Hans the puffin from the upcoming episode "Huffin and Puffin," although the puffin is from Denmark.


	8. April 12 to April 21, 2010

**71.) ****April 12, 2010****: "Pizza Dinner"**

"Boys, I sure could go for some pizza," Skipper said to his team one evening. "I think I'm gonna call and order one."

"With anchovies?" Private asked optimistically.

"Sure," Skipper smiled.

"Great idea, Skipper," Kowalski spoke up, "but how are we going to pay for the pizza? We don't have enough change."

"Not to worry, Kowalski," Skipper replied. "I know Alice's credit card number."

Skipper then retrieved Kowalski's talking computing device and programmed it with what would need to be said to the restaurant over the phone. When done, he brought it over to the phone, dialed the pizza shop, and played the message to the man who answered.

_"Hello there. I'd like a large anchovy pizza delivered to the __Central Park__ Zoo's front office. Charge it to 59698-212AO-V41925. Thanks, have a good night."_

"And now we wait," Skipper said as he hung up the phone.

But moments later, Skipper realized he had made a serious error.

"Holy fish paste!" he exclaimed suddenly. "That wasn't Alice's credit card number, that was the launch code for our nuclear missiles!"

"We have nuclear missiles?" Kowalski asked.

"Um, I've said too much already," Skipper replied. "Disregard my last statement, and that's an order."

* * *

**72.) ****April 13, 2010****: "All Wrong"**

"Come on, Skipper, you know I'm right," Marlene continued in her disagreement with Skipper.

"No, but I do know you're wrong," Skipper continued.

Marlene then reached forward and grabbed Skipper by the sides and shook him a little.

"Marlene, what are you doing to me?" Skipper asked.

"Just trying to shake some sense into you," Marlene replied.

"Well, you're doing it all wrong," Skipper stated.

"Huh?" Marlene wondered, letting go of Skipper. "What do you mean 'all wrong'?"

"I mean, literally, that you're not assaulting me correctly," Skipper continued. "If you're going to take your aggression out on someone, the least I can do is show you how to do it right."

Skipper then took two steps back.

"Let's say someone who was _really_ a threat tried attacking you," he said. "What would you do? Well, I'm gonna show you how to throw that sucker clear across the room."

Skipper then spent the next few minutes explaining the move to Marlene. When done, he had one final tip.

"Never try what I just showed you on me, because I know how to counter it," he said. "But if you want to test it on ring-tail, that's your call, not mine."

* * *

**73.) ****April 14, 2010****: "Pitching Change"**

On a pleasant afternoon in Manhattan, several zoo animals decided to organize a baseball game. All those who were participating split into two teams; the penguins and the lemurs chose opposite sides, naturally.

Since each team was composed of diverse groups of animals, both the penguins' team and the lemurs' team were constantly neck and neck. That was until Kowalski, the penguins' pitcher, gave up a home run to Maurice, which also brought in two other runners and left the penguins and company trailing 7-4.

"You're out as pitcher, Kowalski," Skipper, the penguins' catcher and captain, waddled up to his teammate and said. "I'm switching you around with Rico; you can be on third, but Rico's pitching the rest of the game."

As Kowalski and Rico switched positions and Skipper returned to his, Julien approached the batter's box.

"Ooh, a pitching change," Julien said, picking up his bat. "Tell me, penguin, is he right-flippered or left-flippered?"

But before Skipper could answer, Rico regurgitated a baseball and threw it directly from his gut straight into Skipper's glove.

"Strike one!" yelled umpire Roger.

"Rico's neither, ring-tail," Skipper smiled as he tossed the ball back to Rico. "He plays by his own rules."

* * *

**74.) ****April 15, 2010****: "The ****Manhattan**** Tea Party"** [1H]

"Welcome back," Private, sitting at the table inside the HQ holding a cup of tea in a flipper, said as Skipper and Kowalski returned. "Care for some tea?"

"Put down the teacup and step away from the table, soldier," Skipper stated as he waddled up to the table.

"What?" Private asked, confused, as he set his cup down and got up.

Skipper then turned to Kowalski.

"Kowalski, do it," he said.

Kowalski then approached the table, picked up Private's teacup, and proceeded to dump its contents down the sink.

"Hey, that was mine!" Private declared.

"Indeed it was, Private, and on any other day it would still be," Skipper responded. "But, you see, today is Tax Day in the United States and, well, Kowalski could probably explain the situation better than I could."

"The Boston Tea Party was held on December 16, 1773 to protest British taxation of tea in the colony of Massachusetts," Kowalski stated. "Bostonian colonists boarded harbored British ships and tossed crates of tea into the harbor; today, we remember their spirit by calling for lower taxes and government accountability. And we don't drink tea."

"But I like tea!" Private argued. "There must be some other way!"

* * *

**75.) ****April 16, 2010****: "I Can Almost Feel Her Heartbeat"** [2H]

When a rare afternoon zoovenir shop meeting was suddenly interrupted by humans entering the building, the penguins, lemurs, and Marlene hid amongst the stuffed animals to avoid detection. Everything was going smoothly until a woman stopped beside the shelf Marlene was sitting on and picked her up.

"Ooh, they've finally gotten more otter dolls in," the woman said out loud as she looked Marlene over. "And this one's so realistic – I swear I can almost feel her little heartbeat. Not like those ones where the heads kept popping off like last time. I'm buying this one for sure!"

Skipper knew he had to act quickly, so he turned to Rico.

"Rico, I need a sticky label and a pen, pronto!" he declared.

Once Rico handed him the items, Skipper wrote "50% off" on the label and then stuck it on his chest. He then whistled to draw the attention of the lady who had Marlene.

"Ooh, and a cute penguin, too!" the lady said as she picked up Skipper. "And he's on sale – I'll get both!"

"Hi, Marlene," Skipper then whispered. "After this lady brings us to her house, we'll sneak out tonight. Just try not to blink until then."

* * *

**76.) ****April 17, 2010****: "Mouse in the House"**

While visiting with the penguins inside her habitat, Marlene suddenly saw something scurry across the floor.

"Oh my, a mouse!" she exclaimed, pointing at it.

"Marlene, you're not afraid, are you?" Skipper asked. "You may not have a black belt in karate, but I certainly think you can take on a tiny little mouse."

"I'm not afraid at all, Skipper," Marlene replied. "I just don't want it here in my cave where I live."

"I think we can help you out," Skipper responded, turning then to Rico. "Rico: Mousetrap!"

Rico then hacked-up and handed Skipper a mousetrap. Skipper then pulled back the spring to set the trap and handed it to Marlene.

"Oh, Skipper, I don't want to kill it," Marlene said, looking the trap over. "I just want it out of my home."

Skipper nodded, then looked back to Rico.

"Rico, hook Marlene up with a more humane solution," he said.

Rico then produced a sticky glue trap from his gut and handed it to Marlene.

"That's a glue trap, Marlene," Skipper then said. "When the mouse gets caught on it, put some vegetable oil on it and it peels right off."

"Sounds like a blast," Marlene replied sarcastically.

* * *

**77.) ****April 18, 2010****: "A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words"** [3H]

"OK, Marlene, I've brought our official Penguin Unit photo album with me," Skipper stated as he walked into Marlene's habitat one afternoon and handed her the album. "There should be a photo of Dr. Blowhole inside – maybe now you'll accept that he's real."

Marlene then opened up the album.

"Um, Skipper," she said as she pointed at the first picture while trying to hold in her laughter, "why are you wearing a very uncomfortable-looking bathing suit out on the beach?"

"What?!" Skipper exclaimed as he snatched the album away from Marlene. "I knew I never should have trusted Private with organizing our photos! I don't care if he's good at scrapbooking!"

"OK, calm down, Skipper," Marlene stated. "Just give me back the album; maybe 'Dr. Blowhole' is on the next page."

Skipper then handed the album back to Marlene and she turned the page.

"Aww, a cute little penguin chick hatching from an egg," she said. "So, which one of you guys is this?"

"Um, that's Private," Skipper replied as he turned away blushing.

"No, it's you," Marlene smiled. "I know your hatchdate and the photo is dated. You were so cute!"

"Hey, what do you mean _were_?" Skipper asked.

* * *

**78.) ****April 19, 2010****: "Out of Uniform"**

"Boys, our objective is at the bottom of this hill," Skipper stated as he stood with the other penguins at the top of a grassy hill. "Let's execute."

All four then slid down the hill on their bellies. Upon reaching the bottom, they all stood up together. Something peculiar then caught Skipper's attention.

"Private, what's all that green stuff on your belly?" he asked.

"Looks like a grass stain," Private replied as he looked down at it and tried rubbing it away without success. "Hey, Skipper, it won't come off!"

"Well, green stripes aren't part of the uniform," Skipper responded, turning then to Kowalski. "Kowalski, how can we eighty-six a grass stain?"

"Bleach might work," Kowalski replied. "But we'll have to be careful not to–"

"Rico, hook Private up with some bleach and a toothbrush," Skipper declared, not listening to all of Kowalski's warning.

Rico then hacked-up the items and handed them to Private.

As Private then began to pour some bleach onto the toothbrush, he accidentally spilled some on his left flipper.

"Hot fudge!" Skipper exclaimed. "Those black flipper feathers just turned white!"

"I tried warning you guys," Kowalski then said. "But don't worry, Private, feathers replace themselves. Eventually."

* * *

**79.) ****April 20, 2010****: "Home from Space"** [4H]

"Excellent work on the push-ups, gentlemen," Skipper said proudly as he and the other penguins completed their morning push-up drill out on their habitat's platform. "Now on to our backflip routine."

"Ah, Skipper," Kowalski spoke up, "do you mind if we wait just a few minutes?"

"A delay?" Skipper questioned. "On what grounds, soldier?"

"Well, if I'm reading the sun correctly, the time now is about 0902," Kowalski reported. "The space shuttle is supposed to land in just a few minutes, at 0908, and I'd kind of like to watch it on TV."

"All right," Skipper agreed. "We'll all watch."

All four then entered the HQ and turned their TV to the Fox News Channel and began waiting for the shuttle's touchdown.

"Kowalski, could penguins fly in space?" Private then asked to pass the time.

"Well, since there's no gravity, we'd be able to float about freely," Kowalski responded. "I'm sure it would be fun."

Suddenly, Space Shuttle _Discovery_ appeared on the screen and soon landed safely and successfully on the runway.

"You know, Kowalski," Skipper then said, "if you hadn't forgotten to carry the two, that could have been us."

"Sorry, Skipper," Kowalski apologized. "We'll try it again someday."

* * *

**80.) ****April 21, 2010****: "In the Middle of Nowhere"**

"Boys, I've enjoyed our hiking adventure, but it's time to head home," Skipper stated.

"Very well," Kowalski replied as he pulled out his map and began looking at it. "From where we are it's a two-mile–"

But that's all he was able to say before a sudden gust of wind snatched the map from his flippers.

"Kowalski!" Skipper exclaimed. "Now what?!"

"Not to worry, Skipper," Kowalski responded as he reached behind his back. "See, I've brought my trusty compass with me. We'll be fine as long as we head north."

With Kowalski's assurances, the others began to follow his lead as he led them north through the woods. But after an hour, Skipper began to question his second-in-command.

"Shouldn't we have arrived by now?" he wondered. "My gut tells me you're leading us in circles."

"Science says otherwise, sir," Kowalski replied. "Have some faith."

But then Kowalski spotted rock formations he swore he'd already seen.

"But this can't be!" he declared. "The compass has to be right unless magnetic interference threw off the needle!"

He then thought for a moment, then turned to Rico.

"Rico, you wouldn't happen to have a powerful magnet in your stomach, would you?" he asked.

* * *

* * *

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1H:** In most years, "Tax Day," the last day that federal and state income tax returns can be postmarked by without penalty, occurs on April 15 in the United States. Since 2009, this date has also been marked by protests (called "Tea Parties") in the U.S. by citizens calling for lower taxes, greater government accountability, and fiscal restraint. On a final note, don't feel too bad for Private in this drabble – he'll be back to enjoying his tea tomorrow.

**2H:** The "heads kept popping off like last time" line is in regard to a brief scene from the "Operation: Plush & Cover" episode.

**3H:** Brief scenes in the "Dr. Blowhole's Revenge" episode showed Marlene to be skeptical of Dr. Blowhole's existence. The first photo she sees in this drabble, of Skipper in a bathing suit, stems from a slide of such having been mixed up by Private in the "Go Fish" episode.

**4H:** Kowalski's failure to "carry the two" is in reference to the "Launchtime" episode. Additionally of note, Space Shuttle _Discovery_ did in fact land this morning in Florida after a 15-day mission to the International Space Station. Like Kowalski and the other penguins, I watched the landing live on TV.


	9. April 22 to May 1, 2010

**81.) ****April 22, 2010****: "Much ****Ado**** About Nothing"**

The first one prepared to start the day, Skipper stood out on the platform waiting for his teammates to join him. After just a few minutes of being alone, Skipper was soon joined by Kowalski.

"Good morning, sir," Kowalski said as he gave his leader a salute.

"Good morning, Kowalski," Skipper responded, returning the salute.

Moments later, Rico reported for duty.

"Good to see you, Rico," Skipper called over to him.

"Yup," Rico replied.

Last to arrive was Private, who waddled in two minutes later.

"Nice of you to join us, Private," Skipper smiled. "Well, the gang's all here. Now all we have to do is wait for sweet lady chaos to make her first move."

The penguins then stood together, waiting for some situation to develop that they could declare a mission for.

And they continued to wait. And wait. And wait some more.

But nothing happened.

"Skipper, shouldn't something interesting have happened to us by now?" Private inquired, breaking the long-standing silence.

"You would think," Skipper agreed.

"Indeed," Kowalski added. "The lack of any object, event, or element provoking our commando responses thus far does smell a bit fishy."

"More than fishy," Skipper stated. "It smells like conspiracy."

* * *

**82.) ****April 23, 2010****: "Anything but Love"** [1I]

"Private, turn on the radio," Skipper stated as the penguins assembled after a successful mission-filled day. "Let's all relax for a while."

Private then went to turn it on.

_"You're listening to __New York__'s number one station for love,"_ the announcer on the station the radio was set to said on the air. _"All love songs, all the time."_

"Private, change the channel," Skipper then declared. "There will be no love songs in these barracks, especially with Rico's sensitivities."

Private then reached for the tuner to change stations, but found the knob quite difficult to turn. When he tried forcing it, the knob simply broke off.

"Um, Skipper," Private said, "I think I broke it."

"Broke it?" Skipper questioned. "Well, you better just turn it off then."

"I can't," Private replied. "The tuner and the power switch are on the same knob."

It all couldn't have come at a worse time.

_"That was Phil Vassar with 'Love is a Beautiful Thing,'"_ the station announcer announced on the radio. _"Next up it's Meat Loaf with 'I'd Do Anything for Love.'"_

"No, anything _but_ love!" Skipper yelled. "That song's just shy of eight minutes – there's no way Rico's going to make it!"

* * *

**83.) ****April 24, 2010****: "Needle and Thread"** [2I]

"Just two more inches, boys," Skipper said as the other penguins held him up as he attempted to swipe the box of jelly donuts that was on the top shelf of Alice's locker.

But just as he made contact with the box, Skipper lost his balance and fell forward, yanking down Alice's jacket from its hanger in the process.

As Kowalski and Rico helped Skipper to his feet, Private glanced at Alice's jacket.

"Skipper, you ripped it!" he stated, noticing a tear on the left sleeve.

"Well, it was an accident," Skipper responded. "Besides, Alice will probably never even notice it."

"But, Skipper," Private continued, "shouldn't we at least try to do the right thing? Maybe we could fix it."

Skipper then looked at the torn jacket sleeve, then to Private.

"OK, young Private, I suppose we could try," he said. "Go get your sewing kit from the HQ."

Private then left to fetch his sewing kit. He returned moments later and handed it to Skipper.

"Oh, I'm not sewing anything," Skipper stated, handing the kit back to Private. "You do it."

"Me, sir?" Private wondered. "But I didn't do the damage."

"True," Skipper responded. "But I hate needles. Remember?"

* * *

**84.) ****April 25, 2010****: "Christmas in April"** [3I]

"Hey, guys, does anyone know what today is?!" Marlene said cheerfully as she walked into the penguins' HQ.

"Sunday," Private answered.

"True, but that's not what I was going for," Marlene replied. "It's Christmas in April!"

"_Christmas in April?_" Skipper questioned. "Marlene, the _real_ Christmas was just four months ago. And even your 'favorite' holiday, 'Christmas in July,' is still three months away."

"But, Skipper, shouldn't we try to keep the Christmas spirit alive all year long?" Marlene asked, pulling some fish out from behind her back. "See, I've even brought some fish as presents for you guys."

Skipper looked at the fish and smiled. But then he felt guilty because he had nothing for Marlene in return.

An idea then struck him, and he waddled over to whisper it in Rico's ear.

After being told what to do, Rico regurgitated a fake Santa Claus beard, attached it to his face, and waddled over to Marlene.

"What's with the beard, Rico?" Marlene inquired puzzledly.

"Rico's the real Santa," Skipper answered as he walked over to her. "Whatever gift you want he's sure to have in his gut. Consider it our way of wishing you a merry 'Christmas in April,' Marlene."

* * *

**85.) ****April 26, 2010****: "Paleontologist Penguins?"**

"Skipper, what exactly are we digging this hole for anyway?" Private asked as he helped Skipper dig a large pit in the ground.

"Oh, I could tell you, Private," Skipper replied, "but then there'd be no mystery. I wouldn't want to spoil your sense of imagination."

As Private then lifted yet another shovelful of dirt, he suddenly noticed something white and bone-like mixed within the scoop of soil.

"Skipper, I've found something!" Private exclaimed as he put his shovel down and picked up the mysterious object. "I think it's a bone!"

"A dinosaur bone, probably!" Skipper stated as he took the bone from Private. "Wow, what a find! Let's get this to Kowalski for analysis."

Skipper and Private then returned to the HQ to see Kowalski. After filling him in on the details, Skipper handed the bone to Kowalski.

"So, what are we lookin' at, Kowalski?" Skipper then asked. "T-Rex? Pterodactyl? Triceratops, perhaps?"

"Alaskan salmon," Kowalski answered.

"_Alaskan salmon?_" Skipper wondered. "Funny, I never knew there was a dinosaur that had the same name as a fish before."

"There isn't, sir," Kowalski said as he handed the bone back to Skipper. "All you've got is a regular old fish bone."

* * *

**86.) ****April 27, 2010****: "Finger Painting"**

As Skipper waddled into Marlene's habitat, he found her working hard on a painting project behind an easel.

"Hello, Marlene," he greeted. "Trying to become the next da Vinci?"

"No, not today," Marlene responded. "I'm only finger painting."

"Finger painting?" Skipper asked. "Marlene, aren't you a little old for that?"

"Hey!" Marlene objected playfully. "You're never too old for art."

Skipper then waddled over to Marlene to take a closer look at her canvas.

"You know," he said, pointing at the painting, "that's not half bad. You've got a way with the brush – or should I say _finger_."

"Thanks, Skipper," Marlene smiled. "Hey, want to try it?"

"I can't," Skipper replied, raising a flipper. "I lack fingers."

Marlene rolled her eyes.

"Maybe you can't finger paint," she said as she slapped some green paint on Skipper's flipper, "but you can _flipper_ paint."

Skipper then dragged his flipper across the canvas a few times to distribute the paint.

"See, Skipper," Marlene said as Skipper finished, "you _can_ do this."

"Yeah," Skipper said, looking at the canvas. "But look, some of my flipper feathers stuck in the paint."

"Oh, don't worry, Skipper," Marlene smiled. "It adds some nice texture to the painting."

* * *

**87.) ****April 28, 2010****: "Guest for the Night"**

After a long night of playing cards with the penguins at their HQ, Marlene got up from the table and went over to a chair across the room to sit down while the penguins worked on putting the cards away.

Moments later, Private waddled over to talk with Marlene.

"So, Marlene," he said, "you sure had a good strategy when you passed Skipper the Queen of Spades."

But Marlene didn't respond.

"Marlene?" Private asked as he walked up to her.

It was then that he noticed that Marlene was asleep.

"Hey, Skipper," Private then called to his leader, "Marlene fell asleep."

"Well, it's best not to wake her up, Private," Skipper responded. "She always screams when you do."

"So, what do we do, then?" Private asked.

"She can stay here – she's not going to hurt anything," Skipper replied, turning then to Rico. "Rico, hook our slumbering sea mammal up with a blanket."

Rico then hacked-up a blanket and waddled over to place it on Marlene.

"Aww, she looks so peaceful," Private then said.

Soon after, however, Marlene began to snore.

"Oh, I forgot Marlene did that," Skipper said, turning again to Rico. "Hey, Rico, do you still have those earmuffs?"

* * *

**88.) ****April 29, 2010****: "Puzzled"**

"So, what do you guys want to do tonight?" Skipper asked his team one evening.

"We could play checkers," Private suggested.

"No, I was thinking something all four of us could do together," Skipper replied.

"Well, there's always that 500-piece jigsaw puzzle we liberated from the zoovenir shop," Kowalski said.

"Agreed," Skipper stated, turning then to Rico. "Rico, fetch us the puzzle, please."

Rico then went to the shelf where the puzzle was and picked it up. Moments later, he brought it over to the table and dumped the pieces out.

"Let's get started, boys," Skipper said as he began digging through the pieces. "But remember, since I'm your commanding officer, I get to put the last piece in."

"But, Skipper, I'm the youngest," Private spoke up. "I should put the last one in."

"No, the puzzle idea was mine," Kowalski stated. "So I should."

"Come on, let's not argue," Skipper declared. "Let's just get started."

The four then spent the next hour working on the puzzle. But when they came just one piece away from completion, the piece was nowhere to be found.

That was until Rico regurgitated it.

"Mine," he smirked as he put in the last piece.

* * *

**89.) ****April 30, 2010****: "More Like Me"**

Although it pained Skipper to admit it, Julien was right for once.

"Ring-tail, I'm afraid you've got a point," he said. "It seems you're actually correct on this matter."

"Well, thank you, my flippered friend," Julien replied. "But it's not so much that I'm right – it's just that you need to start thinking more like me."

"Think like you?" Skipper wondered. "Come on, ring-tail, let's not go crazy here."

"Just try it, penguin," Julien stated as he placed his crown on Skipper's head. "There. Now think like your king."

Skipper really had no desire at all to try thinking like a lemur. But suddenly an idea came to him and he smiled to himself.

"Think like you?" he chuckled. "OK."

Skipper then cleared his throat.

"I am the greatest penguin that has ever lived," he said. "I've got the shiniest beak on the block, and my feathers are top-notch. There is not a bird more noble than I; all should worship me, the king of the world."

Skipper then stopped and waited for Julien's reaction, expecting him to denounce his mockery. But he was shocked by the lemur's response.

"Bravo, penguin!" Julien cheered. "I couldn't have done it better myself."

* * *

**90.) ****May 1, 2010****: "A Flash of Genius"** [4I]

"Kowalski, go long!" Skipper declared as he pulled his flipper back and threw the football he was holding in his teammate's direction.

Unfortunately, however, Skipper overshot his pass and missed Kowalski completely; the football entered the lemur habitat and hit Julien in the back of the head.

"Ouch!" the lemur king exclaimed.

Skipper and Kowalski then waddled over to make sure Julien was OK.

"Sorry about that, ring-tail," Skipper apologized.

"No trouble at all, my friend," Julien replied. "It is but a mere bump; not anything which might cause substantial cranial damage."

"Uh-huh," Skipper remarked puzzledly.

"Anyway, now that you two Aves – who are flightless due to your solid bones, short wings, and heavy bodies – are here, let me tell you my latest thoughts regarding quantum mechanics," Julien continued. "Oh, photons and protons and electrons – how I love them so."

"Kowalski, I think Julien got hit just a little too hard on the head," Skipper then whispered into Kowalski's ear. "He's starting to sound like a genius; he's acting more 'Kowalski' than even you do."

Kowalski nodded, then looked to Julien.

"You know, subatomic particles really are great," he replied.

"Kowalski, don't take advantage of his mental condition!" Skipper chastised.

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1I:** Rico's "sensitivities" referenced herein refer to the "gooey love/mush sensitivity" he was said to suffer from in the "All Choked Up" episode.

**2I:** Skipper's hatred of needles stems from the "Needle Point" episode.

**3I:** Marlene was revealed to be fond of "Christmas in July" celebrations in the "Happy King Julien Day!" episode.

**4I:** The idea for this drabble stems, in part, from a review which Skoolgrl09 submitted on the last installment of my original "One Hundred Days of Drabbles" project on December 15, 2009. As part of the review, she wrote "That just gave me an idea you could use in your next set of drabbles. You could make one to where King Julien is a genius all of a sudden. Perhaps for a King Julien and Marlene moment, which can take place shortly after the episode 'Otter Things Have Happened.'" Even though I was unable to properly incorporate a Julien-Marlene moment because of my own desire to keep to a sort of "personal continuity" in my writing, I was still able to use the suggestion to develop a drabble around. Thanks for the idea, Skoolgrl09!


	10. May 2 to May 11, 2010

**91.) ****May 2, 2010****: "Anchormanesia 2.0"** [1J]

Once the groundbreaking ceremony had wrapped-up at the Central Park Zoo, the driver of the "Live at Five" news van walked back to the van to find that his anchorman, Chuck Charles, was already there, asleep in the passenger seat.

"You OK there, Chuck?" he asked as he tapped on the anchorman's shoulder.

"Oh, me? I'm just great," Chuck replied as he awoke. "Now hurry up and get in so we can pick up some sushi before we return to the studio."

"Sushi?" the driver inquired puzzledly. "Chuck, you hate sushi."

"What?!" Chuck objected. "What are you talking about? I love fish, and sushi is my favorite."

"Yeah," the driver remarked sarcastically.

"Hey, don't you be giving your commanding officer any lip," Chuck responded.

"Commanding officer?" the driver wondered. "Chuck, you're just an anchorman."

"And the Grand Canyon is just a hole in the ground," Chuck replied. "Hey, you know what? Forget the sushi – I want to go for a quick swim instead."

"Swimming now?" the driver remarked. "Chuck, if I didn't know you better, I'd swear you've suddenly gotten the mind of a penguin."

"Now why would you say that?" Chuck asked. "And what have you got against penguins?"

* * *

**92.) ****May 3, 2010****: "The Medicine Man"**

"All right, Rico, it's time to take your medicine," Kowalski said as he poured some cough syrup into a teaspoon. "You'll be feeling better very soon."

"I don't wanna," Rico mumbled in protest. "It tastes bad."

"It tastes like grape," Kowalski replied as he inched the spoon close to Rico's mouth.

"Nope!" Rico objected as he swatted the spoon out of Kowalski's flipper.

"Rico, unless you want your cough treated by the vet – who will probably give you a shot for it – you're going to have to let me to treat you myself," Kowalski stated.

"No!" Rico declared as he closed his beak tightly.

Just then, Skipper waddled by.

"Skipper, I don't know what to do," Kowalski said. "Rico refuses to take his medicine on account of taste."

"Hmm," Skipper responded. "Perhaps we should try thinking outside the box."

"How so?" Kowalski asked.

"Well, you know how they hide pills for dogs in pieces of cheese?" Skipper whispered in Kowalski's ear. "We should try something similar for Rico."

"Ah, I've got just the thing," Kowalski whispered back as he pulled out a hollow inert grenade and poured some medicine inside behind Skipper's back. "He'll never expect it hidden in this."

* * *

**93.) ****May 4, 2010****: "Birds of a Feather Chill Out**** Together"** [2J]

"Whoa, boys, is it getting hot in here or what?" Skipper asked his unit in the HQ on a swelteringly hot afternoon.

"I concur," Kowalski said.

"Uh-huh," Rico agreed.

"Indeed," Private stated. "Perhaps we should all go for a swim."

"Nah, that water is much too warm on a day like today," Skipper responded. "What we really need to do is something drastic."

Skipper then waddled over to the refrigerator and opened up the door. He then used his flippers to estimate the height, width, and depth of the inside before he turned to his team and nodded.

"It'll be a squeeze, but there should be enough room for all of us," he said as he began to climb into the refrigerator.

"Skipper, you can't be serious," Kowalski responded. "All of us? In the refrigerator?"

"Hey, it's your call," Skipper replied. "But it'll beat the heat."

Exhausted by the heat, the others decided to join their leader in the refrigerator, finding it a much tighter squeeze than Skipper had originally anticipated.

After a while, Private became thirsty, so he pulled the flipper next to him.

"Hey, Skipper, could you pass the orange juice?" he asked.

"I'm not Skipper," Kowalski replied.

* * *

**94.) ****May 5, 2010****: "Greetings From Gerfurjicklestan"** [3J]

"I've brought the mail, Skipper," Private said as he returned to the HQ after raiding the zoo's mailbox to obtain mail sent to the penguins.

"Anything good?" Skipper then asked.

"Well, let's see," Private responded as he flipped through it. "Kowalski got his latest issues of _National Review_ and _Scientific American_, you've gotten a letter with a big red 'classified' stamp on it, and it seems we've all gotten a postcard."

"A postcard?" Skipper asked. "Who's it from?"

Private then looked at the name of who had sent the postcard.

"It's from Buck Rockgut, sir," Private replied.

"Rockgut?" Skipper asked. "I thought we sent him halfway across the world after he cracked looking for the Red Squirrel a few months ago. What's he say?"

Private then cleared his throat and began to read the postcard.

_"Greetings from Gerfurjicklestan. I am hot on the trail of the Red Squirrel. I haven't caught him yet, but I'm close – I can feel it. The day of reckoning is soon coming for that criminal, and I'll see to it that he's behind bars for good. Thanks again for your tip, soldiers! Sincerely, Buck Rockgut."_

"But, Skipper," Private then commented, "didn't you make up Gerfurjicklestan?"

* * *

**95.) ****May 6, 2010****: "Bingo!"**

One evening, the penguins, lemurs, and Marlene got together to play bingo at the penguins' HQ. Rico volunteered to be the official caller; he shuffled the numbered balls inside his gut before regurgitating them one at a time during the game.

"I-18," Rico called upon hacking-up that number.

"Yes!" Private declared as he marked that space on his card.

"O-75," Rico called out next.

"Thank you, Rico," Skipper smiled as he stamped that location.

As the game continued along, Marlene and Julien both noticed each other's card was just one number away from winning.

"Oh, if only I could get this flightless bird to call N-41," Julien then said.

"Julien, you can't cheat," Marlene responded.

"Oh, really?" Julien replied as he stood up. "Watch me."

Julien then walked up to Rico.

"Penguin, if you call N-41, I'll split the winnings with you," he whispered into Rico's ear. "You know, I keep 90 percent, you get 10 percent."

"Hey, no fair!" Marlene declared as she approached Rico as well. "Rico, call G-58 and I'll give you all of my breakfast fish tomorrow."

"No!" Rico declared as he regurgitated the next number. "B-14!"

"Bingo!" Kowalski exclaimed.

Both Marlene and Julien were shocked.

* * *

**96.) ****May 7, 2010****: "PRIVATE"**

With the other penguins engaged in training exercises, Private decided to do some overdue spring cleaning inside the HQ.

After an array of other maintenance activities, Private began clearing off a shelf that held an assortment of various junk and clutter belonging to all four penguins. While doing so, he came across a mysterious box that had his name written on it in big capital letters: _PRIVATE_.

"Funny, I don't remember ever having this before," Private remarked to himself as he removed the box's lid. "I wonder what I put in it."

Private then looked inside and found several notes written in a strange code as well as some sort of decoding device. As Private began to take them out for closer inspection, Skipper waddled in.

"Say, Private," Skipper then stated, "what do you think you're doing with that box?"

"I'm not sure," Private responded. "I forget why I even had this box."

"Huh?" Skipper wondered. "What makes you think that's yours? It's not like your name is on it."

"But it is," Private replied as he pointed at his name.

"That's not your name, Private," Skipper stated. "I wrote that because the contents are _private_ – for my eyes only."

* * *

**97.) ****May 8, 2010****: "Fleas"**

While waddling together on a recon mission one afternoon, the penguins were suddenly accosted by a familiar feline.

"Oh, my penguin friends, you have to help stop my suffering!" Max, the penguins' stray cat friend, said as he approached the group. "The horror! The torture! I cannot escape it!"

"What is it, man?!" Skipper asked. "Has Officer X been harassing you again?"

"Oh, this is a totally different kind of torture," Max responded as he began to scratch behind his neck. "I'm being attacked by fleas!"

"Bloodsucking fiends!" Skipper declared. "But don't worry, we can fix this."

Skipper then looked to Rico.

"Rico, fix moon cat up with a flea collar," he said.

Rico then hacked-up a red one and handed it to Max.

"Thanks," Max said as he placed the collar around his neck. "But what about the fleas that are still attacking right now?"

"Hmm," Skipper pondered before turning back to Rico. "Rico, could I get a flea bomb, please?"

Rico chuckled darkly as he then regurgitated a round ball bomb and lit it.

"Fleas go kaboom!" he declared.

Max's eyes suddenly widened with shock.

"No, Rico!" Skipper declared. "We don't want the cat to go kaboom, too!"

* * *

**98.) ****May 9, 2010****: "A Card for Mom"**

Upon returning to the lemur habitat, Maurice found Julien working hard on a project.

"What are you working on, King Julien?" he asked while walking over.

"Oh, this?" Julien asked as he held up the card he was writing in. "This is just a Mother's Day card I'm going to send out. And I bet you'll never guess who I'm sending it to."

"Um, your mother?" Maurice asked slowly.

"Wow, Maurice, how did you know?" Julien responded.

"Well, I think sending your mother a card is certainly a nice gesture," Maurice then said. "I should probably send one, too."

"Really, Maurice?" Julien questioned. "Why do you think my mother would want a card from you?"

"Nevermind," Maurice declared, rolling his eyes.

He then glanced at Julien's card.

"Mind if I take a look?" Maurice asked.

"Sure," Julien replied.

Maurice then read the card aloud.

_"Roses are red  
__"Violets are blue  
__"I want to wish a  
__"Happy Mother's Day to you.  
__"Love, King Julien."_

"Your majesty," Maurice then commented, "did you really have to sign your card '_King_ Julien'?"

"Of course, Maurice," Julien replied. "She may be my mother, but I'm still the king – I have a royal reputation to keep."

* * *

**99.) ****May 10, 2010****: "Ballooners"**

"Wow, you can see the whole city from up here," Private commented as he and the other penguins continued to drift through the sky inside the hot air balloon that Kowalski had built. "This is so much fun!"

"Indeed it is," Skipper remarked as he then patted Kowalski on the back with a flipper. "Congratulations, Kowalski, you've managed to create something that hasn't yet threatened society or endangered our lives, and I'm proud of you."

"Thanks, Skipper," Kowalski smiled.

As the team continued to float over the city, they chuckled thinking about how all the humans who looked up and saw the balloon had no clue that it was being operated by penguins.

Then suddenly, a strange gust of wind blew hard against the balloon's envelope, partially collapsing it as the hot air escaped. With no hot air to lift it, the balloon began to drop from the sky.

"Kowalski, increase heat output, pronto!" Skipper declared.

"I can't, sir," Kowalski replied as he tugged on the rope that activated the burner. "We've run out of fuel."

"But without hot air we'll crash!" Private panicked.

"Hot air?" Skipper thought, turning then to Rico. "Rico, I sure hope you've packed some beans."

* * *

**100.) ****May 11, 2010****: "Well Played"** [4J]

"This is a job for science!" Kowalski stated confidently as he pulled out his clipboard to plot a solution to the penguins' latest predicament. "Just give me a moment and–"

"No dice!" Skipper stated as he quickly slapped Kowalski. "We haven't the time."

"Of all the stars in the galaxy, my favorite is the toasted marshmallow fish," Kowalski then said.

"What?" Skipper wondered.

"Life is like a box of homerun derby," Kowalski continued. "No pale pastels, but polka-dotted leprechaun toothpicks."

"Skipper, you hit him too hard!" Private then exclaimed. "You broke Kowalski!"

Skipper's heart suddenly sunk.

"Kowalski, no!" he yelled. "I didn't mean to hurt you, I swear!"

"The xylophone is really a banjo in disguise," Kowalski continued.

"I'm so sorry," Skipper then apologized. "Really, I'd do anything to fix you right now."

"Would you admit that you were wrong?" Kowalski asked.

"Yes!" Skipper answered with great concern. "Anything! Anything!"

"Then I'm back, sir," Kowalski stated as if nothing had happened.

Skipper then realized that Kowalski's disorientation was just a ruse.

"Kowalski, that was a dirty rotten trick!" Skipper then yelled.

He then waddled over to Kowalski and patted him on the back.

"Good work, soldier," Skipper smiled. "Well played."

* * *

**Drabble Notes**

**1J:** Throughout much of the episode "Command Crisis" (which is currently unaired and available only on the show's special DVD release, "Operation: DVD Premiere"), Skipper believed that he was TV anchorman Chuck Charles, suffering from a condition that Kowalski dubbed "anchormanesia." Spoiler warning for the rest of this drabble note: At the end of the episode, however, Skipper's condition was revealed to just be a ruse to test the rest of his team. For this drabble, I thought it would be funny to sort of reverse roles a little and show what might happen if Chuck Charles suddenly began to think he was Skipper.

**2J:** This drabble was inspired by a photograph I took of stuffed Skipper and Rico toys I had placed in my freezer just over a month earlier.

**3J:** Buck Rockgut and his obsessive quest to capture the Red Squirrel were featured in the episode "The Red Squirrel." Also, it should probably be noted that Private and the others _can_ generally read now (within reason) per my practice of personal continuity.

**4J:** The idea to make Kowalski speak gibberish was inspired by his doing so after being slammed to the ice by the sewer rat king in the "Miracle on Ice" episode.

* * *

**On Final Analysis****: 100 Days Comes to an End**

Overall, I've really enjoyed working on this sequel project. Some days the ideas for the drabble plots came easy, some days they were more of a challenge, but throughout I always stayed determined to complete the project as promised to myself and the readership. I have, on my honor, now completed this project according to the rules I set forth and took an oath to uphold – it is by these presents that I can now relieve myself from my duties as a 100-day double-drabblist.

When I completed my original "One Hundred Days of Drabbles" in December 2009, I decided to thank those who had submitted reviews on it. So, in keeping with tradition, I'd like to again take a moment to thank those who have posted reviews on the first nine chapters of this sequel project. So far, 24 individuals have submitted a total of 49 reviews on "One Hundred Days of Drabbles: Double Time!" They are (in order of their first review): **Myrkin**, **halfhuman123**, **Sky-Blue-Indigo**, **ggreen7295**, **SkullShovel**, **knockknocktimerico**, **ruthc93**, **Yokai Summoner**, **SkullCemetery**, **kvzpenguin** (penguin212), **matchmaker**, **KowalskiFan**, **PinkPirate**, **warriorgirl07**, **Kerjen**, **PinkNinja!**, **Warlord-Xana**, **random**, **SomeRandomPenguin**, **milordo-z 2.0**, **Jokegirl**, **Iron-Mantis**, **SBATP**, and **(none yet)**. While I appreciate all of my readers, I especially appreciate these 24 who have taken the time to provide feedback. They truly make all the hours I've given to this project (well over 100 of them) worth it.

And so concludes this final installment of "One Hundred Days of Drabbles: Double Time!" I certainly hope you've enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

_GrandOldPenguin  
_Tuesday, May 11, 2010  
3:45 a.m. Eastern Daylight Time


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